Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney- The Dead Thief's Turnabout
by DeraldSny
Summary: As a reward for clearing Nepgear in the previous story, Vert invites Rei Ryghts to Leanbox for a relaxing vacation... only for Rei to be caught up in a case involving a soldier, a thief, and a murder in a dark alley...
1. Prologue

Hello, loyal readers! Here's a new case for Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney! This story's going to be a bit shorter than the last one, mainly because it's a two-day case instead of three, like the previous story... That being said, I hope you enjoy this prologue!

Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney

The Dead Thief's Turnabout

By Derald Snyder

Prologue

The airplane touched down on the runway without incident.

It taxied to the exit tunnel, the passengers getting off without incident. Among said passengers was one woman who was trying her best to keep a low profile, which wasn't too hard, given her small size.

As said passenger approached the security check point, however... this is when the incident happened.

 _August 16, 12:05 PM_

 _Leanbox City Airport_

 _Security Checkpoint_

(So far, so good,) the lawyer thought to herself as she walked toward the security checkpoint. (Now let's just hope the security guards don't make too much of a fuss...) Fortunately, the guards seemed to be preoccupied with screening passengers who were getting on the next flight out of Leanbox... Unfortunately, one of said passengers happened to notice the lawyer's heather blue hair and segmented horn-like protrusion.

"REI RYGHTS!" he screamed, pointing a finger. Immediately all the guards in the area whipped around, their guns clearing leather in a split second, pointing them at the former goddess.

"W-wait a minute! I'm n-not here t-to c-cause any t-trouble!" Rei squeaked, even as she dropped her rolling suitcase and spread her hands. Her assertion apparently fell on deaf ears, as she was swiftly grabbed and shoved against the wall by two of the guards.

"We're not about to give you the chance to do to Leanbox what you did to Planeptune!" growled one of the guards, taking out a pair of handcuffs.

"HOLD IT!" yelled a strong male voice. Several of the guards turned to see a Leanbox Army soldier, decked out in full greenish-brown armor (including a helmet that covered his face), wielding a .30-caliber assault rifle. "In the name of Lady Vert, I command you to release that woman!"

"And just who are you?" inquired one of the guards.

"Petty Officer Adrian-118," the soldier stated, saluting. "I was sent by Lady Vert herself to escort Ms. Rei Ryghts from the airport. So, if you'll just release her into my custody, we can consider this incident resolved." The guards looked uncertain at this, until...

"Hey! What's going on over here?!" An older man with a greying mustache and beard walked on to the scene.

"Chief!" One of the guards responded, saluting. "Look who we found trying to infiltrate our country!" He pointed to the lawyer who was still pinned to the wall.

The security chief blinked as he peered over his sunglasses to get a better look. "Is that who I think it is?"

"I'm not infiltrating!" Rei protested. "I was invited here by Lady Vert herself!"

"You think we're gonna buy that?" Another guard spoke up.

"Actually, she speaks the truth," Adrian-118 cut in. "I was asked by Lady Vert to escort Ms. Ryghts to her Basilicom..."

The chief glanced over at the petty officer, before shaking his head. "I'm sorry, soldier, but this is a civilian airport, not a military base. I'm afraid you have no authority here... and I'm certainly not taking any chances with this psycho, of all people."

"Well then..." a familiar female voice spoke up, "It's a good thing I decided to come along, then." Everyone save Adrian turned and gasped to see none other than Leanbox's CPU herself, a stern look on her face.

"Lady Vert!" gasped the chief, standing at attention. "With all due respect, what's the meaning of this?"

Vert just sighed. "Clearly none of you have been following the news lately. This woman here is no longer the insane goddess who tried to destroy Gamindustri... She is, in fact, a successful defense attorney who managed to clear one of my fellow goddesses from false charges recently. I invited her here from cold, snowy Lowee as a reward for her stellar work. So then, if you'll kindly release her..."

"B-but, Lady Vert..." the security chief protested.

The blonde woman's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Don't tell me you're about to defy a direct order from your goddess..."

The elderly man recoiled at this. "Ahh! N-no, of course not! Perish the thought, Lady Vert!" Turning to his subordinates, he ordered, "You heard the lady! Let her go!" The guards reluctantly complied, Rei pulling away from them as soon as their grip loosened up, retrieving her suitcase and walking over to the CPU's side.

"That's better," Vert smiled radiantly. "Well then, we'll be on our way now, gentlemen..." Turing to the gathered crowds, she raised her voice, "False alarm, everyone! There is no cause for panic! Please return to your normal business! I repeat, there is no cause for alarm, please return to your normal business." The people slowly dissipated, returning to their previous tasks, though the conversation was still somewhat muted compared to earlier.

Rei breathed a huge sigh of relief. "Th-thank you so much... I th-thought for sure I w-was g-going to jail j-just for b-being me..."

"It's no trouble," Vert chuckled. "Honestly, it's been years since that ruckus you caused... you would think people here would have forgotten it by now... Anyway, shall we be going?"

 _August 16, 12:13 PM_

 _Leanbox City Airport_

 _Main Lobby_

Rei Ryghts nervously glanced around as she was escorted by Vert and Adrian-118 through the airport... several citizens were glancing curiously back at her, some of them turning disgusted or upset upon recognition... However, a quick glare from Vert caused them to quickly return to their previous tasks. The added presence of a Leanbox soldier also seemed to help set the peoples' minds more at ease.

"So, um... Mr. Adrian, was it?" she spoke to the soldier. "You aren't scared of me at all?"

"I trust Lady Vert's judgement," Adrian-118 responded without missing a beat. "Of course, now that I've seen you up close and personal, I find it hard to believe you were the cause of the chaos in Gamindustri some years back, with the anti-goddess Citizen's Group and all."

"Technically, she wasn't," Vert spoke up. "According to Neptune and Nepgear, an evil fairy from another dimension bestowed power on Rei that came from an ancient CPU who had been something of a tyrant in the past... though, it sounds like she's now seen the error of her ways." Had Vert been looking at Rei as she said this, she might have noticed the lawyer silently gritting her teeth...

"Oh, I see... so that evil power caused Ms. Ryghts to become an evil tyrant herself, then?" Adrian asked.

"N-not b-by choice," Rei muttered. "I-I'm kind of g-glad I d-don't actually r-remember it... I'd p-probably still b-be having n-nightmares..." Taking a breath to clear her head, she continued, "At least I'm t-trying my best t-to b-be a productive member of society now..."

"Well, good for you, ma'am," the soldier nodded. "Lady Vert said you cleared one of her fellow goddesses from false charges?"

"Nepgear, actually," Vert supplied. "You should go read 'The Mech Suit's Turnabout' for further details..."

"Um, uh, I'll do that," Adrian muttered, his voice indicating he was somewhat confused.

"S-so what were we going to do on th-this... vacation?" Rei asked Vert as they walked through the doors to the parking lot.

"Well, I have such a backlog of video games to get through, it'll take an eternity for me to do them all," Vert sighed. "I was hoping we could have some fun with the two-player games in my pile..."

(That actually doesn't sound too bad...) Rei thought to herself, before something occurred to her. "J-just as long as you d-don't make me do any BL g-games..."

The Leanbox CPU's face took on a look of disappointment. "What a shame... but I suppose that narrows down the choices a fair amount..."

"No comment," muttered Adrian. Suddenly, a small man with wild dark hair dressed in rags came running out of nowhere, crashing into the trio, knocking Rei and Vert down.

"What in the world?!" Vert protested.

"Oww! Why always me?!" moaned Rei in despair.

"Yoink!" said the man, as he yanked something off Rei's jacket, before dashing off.

"Huh...?" Rei blinked in confusion as she patted her chest... then she realized something was missing. "My badge! He took my attorney's badge!"

"Hey! Stop, thief!" Adrian yelled as he took off after the man, who was surprisingly fast despite his short stature.

"Ha ha!" the thief laughed. "Fast as fast can be, you'll never catch meeeee!"

"Oh no," Vert groaned as she righted herself. "Not him again..."

"Huh? You know him?" the lawyer asked.

"He calls himself Klept O. Maniac," the goddess explained as she helped Rei up. "He literally steals anything he can get his hands on. The police have been chasing him for weeks now... But Adrian isn't the police. I'm confident he can succeed where the local authorities have failed..."

"S-shouldn't we b-be g-going after them?" Rei pointed out.

Vert nodded. "Yes, I suppose we should..." The two women started running in the direction that Adrian and the thief disappeared...

"Outta the way! Leanbox Army coming through!" Adrian shouted as he pursed Klept O. Maniac through the crowd, which parted quickly for him.

Klept gritted his teeth as he saw that the soldier was still hot on his tail- those fat, sluggish policemen would have given up long ago! Breaking free of the crowd, he took a quick turn down a narrow alley to try and lose his pursuer...

Only to run into something- no, someone, causing him to fall to the ground. Klept looked up...

"And where do you think *you're* going?" There was the sound of cracking knuckles, as the thief broke into a cold sweat...

Meanwhile, Vert and Rei were doing their best to try and catch up with Adrian, though Rei's shorter stature caused her to have trouble keeping pace with the blonde goddess, forcing Vert to slow her pace so as not to leave her behind, even as the crowds remained parted for their CPU...

A loud report sounded from a short distance away, echoing down the street, causing the people to turn their heads toward the source of the noise.

"Was that... a gunshot...?" Rei gasped out.

"Oh dear..." Vert grunted as the two of them jogged toward the alley the thief had ducked into... Their pace slowing to an exhausted walk as they entered said alley, where they were confronted with quite the sight... It was Adrian, standing over the prone body of Klept O. Maniac, blood pooling around his head. The soldier looked up at hearing the two ladies approach...

"Th... this isn't what it looks like!" he insisted. "I didn't shoot him! I swear I didn't...!"

To be continued...


	2. Investigation, Day 1

Well, it took longer than I would have liked, but the first investigation chapter is here! Just a heads-up, this story is going to be a lot more OC-heavy than the last one... the only non-OCs will be Rei, Vert, and maybe one or two others later on... but to tell would be spoiling.

Author Heart Ance- Don't worry, you'll get plenty of information to parse through this chapter...

GXLatias- Yeah, poor Rei can't catch a break, can she? :P

Draen- Yeah, well, from my experience, those words are more often used when someone is caught doing something that looks 'naughty'... *glances around for Iris Heart*

Edit: Almost forgot, credit to mr I hate znt nobles kill em for the character of Klept O. Maniac. Hope he doesn't mind that said character is the victim...

Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney

The Dead Thief's Turnabout

By Derald Snyder

Investigation- Day 1

 _August 16, 1:37 PM_

 _Leanbox Basilicom_

 _Chika's Old Room_

Rei sighed as she flopped on the bed, finally finished unpacking. (Too much excitement for one day... At least I didn't have to do something drastic like transform this time...) She'd been run ragged with questioning from the police that were investigating the shooting incident, even though she'd hardly seen anything... Thankfully Vert had managed to rein them in somewhat.

As for Adrian, he promptly handed over his assault rifle to the authorities, and promised to co-operate as he was taken down to the police station for further questioning. Rei didn't think he'd get in too much trouble- despite denying having pulled the trigger that ended Klept O. Maniac's life, the lawyer doubted that any jury would convict him... (Heck, they might even thank him for stopping that menace from plaguing the streets any longer...)

The door then opened, Vert walking in. "Hello, Rei. Have you settled in? I hope you don't mind using Chika's old room..."

"I-it's fine," Rei nodded. "I'm just glad I got my badge back..." As she said this, her hand subconciously fingered her attorney's badge, once again pinned to her lapel. To her, it wasn't just proof of her having passed the bar exam, but also proof of her resolve to be a better person... "By the way, h-have you heard anything about Adrian...?"

"I'm afraid not," the blonde goddess sighed. "To be honest, I'd logged on to my 4GO account, to check in with my guild, and it ended up slipping my mind... Thankfully, they hadn't started a raid or anything, else I would've been occupied for hours..."

(Why am I not surprised?) Rei sighed internally, before speaking aloud, "W-well, maybe you should c-call the p-police station or s-something...?"

Vert blinked as she remembered something. "Actually, now that you mention it, the detective heading the investigation gave me his card with his phone number..." Checking her pockets, she found what she was looking for. "Ah, here we are... Detective Eddie Green, number 655-2208..." She took out her mobile device and dialed. "...hello, Detective Green? It's Vert, the CPU... I was just curious about how your investigation was coming along... Will Adrian be released soon?" Vert's eyes went wide as information was conveyed to her. "Wait, what? He's been arrested? Court-martial? Excessive force?!" Her face contorted in frustration. "Detective, slow down! I can't understand you!" She heaved a sigh. "Listen, how about I come down to the precinct, and you can explain things face-to-face? ...Very well. Good bye." She hung up. "I don't believe this..."

Rei frowned. "Excessive force? I th-thought the thief was j-just shot dead... how is th-that excessive?"

"I don't understand either," Vert sighed. "But that's not Adrian's style at all... he only ever uses just enough force to subdue an enemy, even when angry..." She rubbed her temples. "I hate to impose on you like this, but could you accompany me down to the precinct? I have a feeling Adrian's going to require your services..."

"I knew it..." the bluenette groaned. "Just when I think I have a chance to relax, I'm caught up in another case..."

"I am truly sorry for this, Rei..." Vert shook her head. "I'd never imagined something like this would happen on your vacation..."

"It's fine," Rei sighed as she sat up and re-donned her shoes. "Fate just has it out for me, I suppose..."

 _August 16_

 _Police Department_

 _Criminal Affairs_

Rei and Vert sat down in the interrogation room as they waited for the detective to arrive. The CPU had managed to hoodwink the police in the building into thinking that she was bringing Rei in for further questioning, in order to avert a panicked reaction from the officers and detectives... Rei herself had just kept her arms crossed and her head down, trying to look as non-threatening as possible...

Soon, the door opened revealing Detective Eddie Green... He was tall, but not stocky or skinny, his short, dirty blonde hair combed back, expressive green eyes set into a mildly handsome, youthful face, with an average Caucasian skin tone... he wore a white trench coat over a gray button-up shirt and dark slacks with gray shoes.

"Greetings to you, Lady Vert," the man nodded in respect at his goddess. "And you as well, Ms... Rights, was it?"

"Ryghts, with a Y," Rei corrected.

"Oh, ryght... I mean, right," the detective shook his head. "Um, anyway, Lady Vert, why is she here?"

"Well, she was a victim of sorts in this case, as that dreadful thief stole her attorney's badge," Vert pointed out.

"Oh, right, I see..." Green muttered as he sat down. "So, ah, you wanted an update on the investigation, right?"

"That is correct," Vert nodded. "And please try to speak more coherently this time."

"Y-yes ma-am," the young man nodded. "Ah... where should I start?"

"You said something about excessive force?" Rei supplied.

"Ah, yeah, that," Eddie nodded. "Well, according to the autopsy, the victim appeared to have been savagely beaten before he was shot... they found multiple bruises all over his body, mostly fresh..."

"That doesn't sound like Petty Officer Adrian at all," Vert muttered in confusion.

"Well, hey, I'm just tellin' you what the autopsy report says," Detective Green shrugged, as he pulled some papers from his trench coat. "I've got a copy right here, if you want to take a look..." he slid the papers over to the two women.

*Autopsy Report added to the Court Record.*

"Hmmmm..." Rei hummed as she skimmed over the report. "Wait , 'Rickard T. Hauser'? I thought his name was Klept O. Maniac..."

"That's the name that came back when we entered his fingerprints into the database," Green clarified. "I guess 'Klept O. Maniac' was just a nickname or something..."

"I see," nodded Vert. "Did they manage to retrieve the bullet that ended Mr. Hauser's life?"

"Yeah, they did..." the detective nodded. "The bullet appeared to be a .338-caliber round, though we couldn't find the shell casing for some reason..."

A sudden smirk crossed the CPU's face. "I see. Well, detective..." She stood up. "I'm afraid I have an... **OBJECTION!** " she declared, pointing her finger at the young man, causing Rei to bury her face in her hands.

"U-um, this isn't a courtroom, Lady Vert..." Green muttered confusedly, his eyes crossing as he tried to focus on the goddess's index finger.

"S-sorry," Vert chuckled as she sat back down. "I just had to say it once... Anyway, there's a critical contradiction in your evidence."

"What's that, ma'am?" Eddie asked.

"Adrian's assault rifle is only .30-caliber!" the CPU proclaimed in triumph. "The bullet you say killed Klept O. Maniac would not have fit in the petty officer's firearm!"

"Oh my gosh!" gasped Rei. "That means he couldn't have killed the victim!"

"Oh no..." the detective groaned in despair. "How the heck did I miss that? What an idiot I am... If only I'd realized that before the Leanbox Army took him into custody...!"

"Huh? What do you mean?" Rei pressed.

"Do you mean to say the army intends to court-martial him?" Vert guessed.

"Yep," muttered Green. "And unlike civilian trials, it's the judge that decides the verdict in a military court-martial... well, here in Leanbox, anyway..." He looked over at Rei. "And if you're thinking of defending him in court, Ms. Rights, forget it. Only military lawyers are allowed to participate in a court-martial..."

"W-well, that d-doesn't mean I can't a-advise the defense or something..." Rei counter-argued.

Eddie shrugged. "Yeah, well, you'd have to ask JAG if that's permissible... I could drive you over there, if you wish..."

"That would be very generous of you, detective," said Vert. "However... I would actually like to go back to the crime scene, first. I assume the police are mostly finished with their investigation?"

"Pretty much, yeah... especially after JAG took over," Green nodded. "I guess you wanna make sure nothing was overlooked, Lady Vert?"

"Yes, precisely," Vert nodded. "After all, if there's anything I've learned from court dramas I've watched on NepTube, it's that even the smallest detail can turn a case completely on its head. Isn't that right, Rei?"

"Uh-huh..." the former goddess agreed. (I'd better start speaking up more often... if I'm not careful, Lady Vert might end up stealing the spotlight in this story!)

 _August 16_

 _Outside Leanbox Airport Parking Lot_

 _Narrow Alley_

Rei wiped her brow from the humid atmosphere as she stepped out of Detective Green's car. Thankfully, it wasn't too hot out at the moment, otherwise it would have been unbearable for the goddess-turned-lawyer... (I've gotten too used to Lowee's chilly weather...) she mused to herself.

"My, I never realized how humid it was today..." Vert sighed as she got out of the car herself, Eddie Green holding the door open for her. The crime scene was mostly deserted, only a few officers still patrolling the area. Squinting her eyes, Rei could just make out the outline where the victim's body had been found down the alley.

"So, first of all, does the alley dead-end?" Vert asked.

Detective Green shook his head. "No, ma'am... it intersects with another alley at a 90-degree angle."

"So, someone could have potentially shot the victim and fled before Adrian got there," Rei spoke up.

"Maybe," the detective shrugged. "But they would have had to take the path going right... the left path was blocked off by a big garbage truck at the time of the crime."

"Would it be OK for us to walk down the alley to try and see where someone would have fled?" Vert requested.

"As long as I come with you," Green asserted. "And try not to touch the outline..."

With that, the trio started down the alleyway, Green in the lead, Vert in the middle, and Rei bringing up the rear, the latter two scanning the walls and floor for anything out of place. When they reached the outline, they carefully stepped over it, though the shorter Rei had to make a small jump. Eventually, they reached the end of the alley, which split into two paths, directly left and directly right.

"So, the right path was the one the true culprit probably took..." Vert muttered to herself as they started down that way... when the trio got near where the alley exited into the open street, they saw a puddle of water stretching across the way. And on the other side of said puddle...

"Look!" cried Rei. "Footprints! Somebody did go this way recently!"

"Well, well... it seems we were right after all," Vert smiled triumphantly.

"Boy, good thing for the humid atmosphere, or these would've dried up by now..." Detective Green muttered. "Of course, they're probably not good enough to match to any shoe soles..."

"Those are definitely female footprints, though," Vert pointed out, as Rei pulled out her own mobile device to take a picture...

(Sh-click!) *Woman's Footprints added to the Court Record.*

"We can probably assume that the woman in question is a tomboy, or at least tougher than the average woman..." Green mused. "After all, if the petty officer didn't beat the victim, then this girl must have..."

"A reasonable deduction," agreed Vert.

"Too bad there aren't any other clues to this woman's identity..." Rei sighed. "But this is better than nothing, I suppose..." As she looked out the alleyway to the right, however, she caught sight of a black-haired man, with a stocky build and average height, dressed in a slightly wrinkled business suit, carrying a black suitcase in one hand. He appeared to be looking up- whether it was into the sky or at the rooftop, she wasn't sure. "W-who's that?"

"Good question," muttered the detective. "Excuse me, sir! This is a crime scene..." The man turned to face the trio, his eyes widening upon recognition of Leanbox's CPU.

"L-Lady Vert!" he promptly straightened up and saluted. "W-what an honor to meet you in person, ma'am!"

"The pleasure is all mine," Vert replied smoothly. "And you are?"

"Steve Hauser, ma'am," the man replied. "Real estate agent, and former Leanbox military."

(Hauser?) thought Rei. (Wait, wasn't that...)

"At ease, soldier," Detective Green ordered, the other man promptly complying. "Might I ask what you're doing here?"

"Well, I *was* supposed to be getting on a flight, but the ruckus from this incident caused me to miss it," Hauser explained. "I heard a petty officer was arrested for the crime?"

Vert nodded. "That is correct, however, both Rei and I have my doubts about his guilt, which is why we're here..."

"Rei?" Hauser blinked in slight confusion, turning his gaze toward the lawyer... before recoiling as recognition kicked in, cowering behind his suitcase. "Y-you! Y-you're Rei Ryghts, aren't you?!" Rei could only sigh resignedly as she hung her head.

"Stand down, Mr. Hauser," Vert cut in. "Would I have her with me- unrestrained, that is- if I still believed her to be a threat to my nation?"

"O-oh, well... I-I guess not..." Steve said as he regained his composure. "My apologies..."

"C-could I ask i-if y-you happened t-to know the victim?" Rei stuttered.

The real estate agent again blinked in confusion. "What, are you an amateur sleuth now...?"

"A-a lawyer, actually..." The former goddess indicated the badge on her lapel.

"Oh, I see," Hauser nodded. "But what makes you think I knew the victim?"

"B-because his real name i-is Rickard T. Hauser," Rei pointed out. "Th-that can't be a coincidence..."

"I-is that right?" muttered Steve as he averted his gaze...

"Mr. Hauser, you just looked down and to the left," Vert interrupted, "that indicates deception. Surely you know better than to try and lie in front of your goddess..."

Hauser recoiled again, before shaking his head and chuckling. "I should've known nothing could get past you, Lady Vert... All right, I admit it. The victim was my younger brother, Ricky... to call him the 'black sheep' of the family would be an understatement." He looked Vert in the eye. "Believe me when I say my family did everything they could to try and help him... to no avail."

"I see..." the blonde goddess nodded in sympathy. "I'm very sorry for your loss, Mr. Hauser... is that why you were looking toward the sky? Were you praying for him?"

"S-something along those lines," Hauser heaved a sigh. "Hopefully his tortured soul is finally at peace..."

Detective Green then cut in, "Well, while I understand your sorrow, Mr. Hauser, the police are still investigating this area, so I'm going to have to ask you to leave..."

"O-of course, I understand," the black-haired man assented. "Well, if you don't think that petty officer did it, I hope you can find who did..."

"Rest assured, we will do everything in our power to bring your brother's killer to justice," Vert promised.

"Thank you, Lady Vert," Steve bowed in respect. "Good luck..." With that, he turned and left.

"We should probably be going, too," said Detective Green. "I don't think we're going to find much else here..."

Vert nodded in agreement. "Then, I suppose it's time to see Adrian... I hope he's holding up okay..."

 _August 16_

 _Leanbox Army Base_

 _Training Grounds_

Vert and Rei looked around at the various soldiers doing exercises and hand-to-hand combat training, as they walked down the path to the main building... Eddie Green had dropped them off at the gate, claiming that he had paperwork to catch up on back at the office. A few soldiers ran up to the duo, causing Rei to hide behind the taller goddess...

"Lady Vert!" A soldier greeted. "Have you heard about Petty Officer Johns?"

"'Johns'?" Rei asked in confusion.

"Adrian Harold Johns," Vert clarified. "That's his full name... and yes, I've heard about what happened. I was there when the incident actually occurred, after all..."

Another soldier spoke up, "So you know that Adrian didn't do this... there's no way, man! No way he did the things they're accusing him of!"

"Please, calm yourself," the goddess commanded in a soothing tone. "My companion and I have already found some clues that may point to another culprit..."

"Your companion?" the last soldier asked, looking at Rei.

"H-hello," Rei waved timidly. "I'm, um, a lawyer and a friend of Lady Vert. N-nice to m-meet you..."

The first soldier shook his head. "For a moment I thought you might be that psycho Rei Ryghts, but that's stupid... I mean, she had two horns, you've only got one... and she didn't wear glasses either..."

"She's closely related," Vert lied smoothly. "But she has no desire to do what Rei Ryghts did... she merely wishes to restore her family's reputation by defending innocents from wrongful prosecution."

"So, you gonna be Adrian's lawyer?" the first soldier asked.

"She can't, man," the second soldier pointed out. "No civilian lawyers in a court-martial, remember?"

"I-I'm hoping I can a-at least a-advise the d-defense in this case," Rei stuttered out.

"Actually, we're on our way to see him right now," said Vert. "I assume you're all from his unit?"

"That's right," the first soldier answered. "We're all kinda upset at what happened... especially DeRommer! We texted him about what happened, and his response was basically, 'it's a lie, he didn't beat up and shoot anyone, that's not the Adrian I know.'"

"Who is this DeRommer?" the CPU inquired.

"Staff Sergeant Pelleas C. DeRommer," the third soldier answered. "He's closer to Adrian than anyone in the unit... er, not like that, though," he quickly corrected upon seeing Vert's eyes light up.

"According to what we've heard," the second soldier added, "Adrian lifted him outta the gutter and convinced 'im to join the army, to give him a purpose in life. DeRommer's been eternally grateful for that..."

"And on the field, those two are an unstoppable team," the first soldier put his two cents in. "Adrian provides cover fire while DeRommer goes in and punches the enemy's lights out! Even Rei Ryghts'd have trouble with those two!"

"I wouldn't go *that* far..." the second soldier muttered.

"S-so, just in case, wh-what does he l-look like?" the lawyer asked.

"He's about as tall as Lady Vert herself, in armor anyway," the first soldier answered. "He dresses in white armor, unlike most troops, and he wears a black-and-white helmet with an orange visor. Can't miss him."

"Course, he's off-duty today, so might not be dressed up like that..." the third soldier pointed out.

"Are you saying you've never seen him outside his armor?" Vert pressed curiously.

"Yeah, he's kinda shy like that," the third soldier sighed. "Doesn't help that he's pretty much a mute..."

"He suffered an injury to his throat that damaged his voice box before joining the army," the first soldier explained. "He usually communicates by texting... but he and Adrian seem to be on the same wavelength, even without words. Probably why they make such a good team..."

"I see," the CPU nodded. Just then, a well-decorated older military officer came running up.

"Hey! What do you soldiers think you're doing, harassing Lady Vert?! Get back to your exercises!" The trio promptly broke up and scattered to avoid the older man's wrath. "Sorry 'bout that, milady... hope they weren't too much of a bother."

"Not at all," the goddess smiled. "We were just talking about Petty Officer Johns and his partner..."

"DeRommer? Yeah, he's a good soldier, 'cept he can't seem to aim a firearm to save his life..." The officer muttered, before clapping his hands once as something occurred to him. "Ah, but where are my manners? I'm General Jeffrey Lawson from JAG. A pleasure to meet you, Lady Vert."

"Likewise," the CPU responded.

"S-same here," said Rei, nervously saluting. "Y-you probably know w-who I am, d-don't you, sir...?"

General Lawson focused his gaze on the lawyer. "Yeah, I know you... but we've got better intel than most. I know you're making an honest living as a lawyer in Lowee now..."

Rei breathed a sigh of relief. (It's a miracle... finally, someone who knows the whole truth about me for once!)

Vert cut in, "So, if you're from JAG, General, I assume you're involved with the investigation involving our petty officer?"

"Actually, I'm going to be the judge presiding over his court-martial," Lawson clarified. "Personally, I have a hard time believing he did this, but I have to remain impartial, so..."

"C-can we talk to him, sir?" Rei inquired.

"Certainly," the general nodded. "Right this way, ladies..."

 _August 16_

 _Leanbox Army Base_

 _Brig- Visiting Room_

Vert and Rei took their seats at a table as General Lawson quietly gave an order to the guards, who promptly walked off to retrieve the petty officer... a few minutes later, Adrian was brought in, now dressed in an orange t-shirts and matching pants- the typical prison uniform- and with a pair of handcuffs on his wrists.

(He looks a bit shorter without the armor,) Rei couldn't help but observe... Still, he was about as well-built as could be expected of a typical soldier... his light brown hair appeared to have grown out slightly from the usual military buzz-cut, his black eyes focusing on the duo as he sat down across from them.

"Hello, Adrian," Vert greeted. "You seem to be holding up well..."

"About as well as can be expected," the soldier nodded. "Ms. Ryghts, I hope the rest of your commute to the Basilicom was uneventful?"

"M-mostly," Rei nodded. "I k-know I can't d-defend you here, but I was hoping I c-could at least advise y-your lawyer or something..."

"We've already found a few clues that might point to another possible suspect," Vert added. "Rei, if you could show him the footprint photo..." The lawyer promptly complied, turning her mobile device so Adrian could see it clearly. "These footprints were found at the other end of the alley, implying someone was fleeing the scene of the crime... most likely a woman. So, I have to ask, when you found the body, did you see anything beyond that?"

The petty officer bit his lip. "Well, now that you mention it, I do remember seeing some motion further down the alley... it could have been someone fleeing..."

"S-so it's possible someone c-could have beaten up the victim, th-then shot him and f-fled before y-you got there?" Rei postulated.

"Could be," Adrian shrugged. "I heard the gunshot right as I entered the alley, so whoever it was cut it pretty close..." He then sighed as he ran both his hands through his hair. "But good luck convincing the prosecutor of that..."

"Have you been assigned a lawyer yet?" asked Vert.

"Not yet," muttered Adrian, "Though it likely won't matter, given who the prosecutor is..."

"W-who's that?" Rei inquired curiously.

"Colonel P. S. Cutter. They call him the 'Undefeated Colonel of the Courtroom', and for good reason... he's never lost a case he's handled. Most military attorneys would rather surrender than fight him, if you catch my drift..."

Rei couldn't help but slam her fists on the table. "So, does that mean you're not gonna fight, either?!"

"Of course not!" Adrian shot back. "I didn't kill that guy! And I sure as hell didn't beat him to a bloody pulp beforehand!"

"All right, settle down," Vert ordered. "Getting hot under the collar isn't going to help us here..."

The petty officer took a deep breath to calm himself. "...You're right, Lady Vert. I'm sorry." He shook his head. "I just worry about how Peach is taking this..."

"Peach?" Vert blinked.

"Yeah, my girlfriend," Adrian clarified. "I met her at a bar a few years back... she's almost as pretty as you, Lady Vert, except she's a little more on the 'cute' side, although her personality is completely different... not in a bad way, though. Which reminds me..." he reached into his pocket, pulling out a small rose-shaped trinket. "She dropped this by accident the last time she and I were together. I was going to return it to her, but it looks like that's not gonna happen now... I don't want to impose on you, Lady Vert, but could you make sure this gets back to her?"

"I suppose I could do that," Vert nodded as Rei took the trinket from the soldier. Adrian then told them the address of his girlfriend's apartment.

*Peach's Trinket added to the Court Record.*

"'To my darling Peach, with all my love. AHJ,'" Rei read the inscription. "That's sweet..."

"Very sweet indeed," agreed Vert.

General Lawson then cut in, "Excuse me, but I'm afraid visiting hours are about over..." Adrian promptly stood up, Rei and Vert following suit.

"Just one more thing, General," said Adrian. "Is it possible for Ms. Ryghts to assist my attorney, whoever it's going to be?"

"Not directly in the courtroom," the general answered. "However, she could come in early before the start of trial, and give her evidence to your lawyer then, as well as share whatever theories she has about this case..."

"I suppose that's what we'll have to do, then," said Vert, Rei nodding in agreement. "But Adrian, do your best to convince your lawyer not to give up right off the bat, just because of this Colonel Cutter..."

"I'll try, Lady Vert," the soldier nodded. "Good luck to you and Ms. Ryghts..." With that, he was led back to his cell by the guards.

"Well then," said the goddess, "I suppose we should stop at Miss Peach's apartment to drop that trinket off, before heading back home..."

"B-but how are we going to get over there?" Rei asked, as they walked out of the brig together. "Detective Green's gone back to his office, so..."

"The same way we got to the police department, of course," Vert replied.

"O-oh, you mean... y-your HDD..." Rei muttered. "W-well, just t-try not to f-fly too fast this t-time... I mean, i-it's not like w-we're in a b-big hurry or anything..."

"Well, that's actually my normal cruising speed..." the CPU pointed out, "But I'll try to slow down a bit this time, for your stomach's sake..."

 _August 16_

 _Apartment Complex, Third Floor_

 _Peach's Apartment_

Vert knocked on the door. "Hello, Miss Peach? It's Vert, the CPU... We're here at your boyfriend Adrian's request..." There was no response.

"M-maybe she's out?" Rei pondered. Out of curiosity, she tried the door knob, and to her mild surprise, the door was unlocked. "Oh, it's open... I guess we can go in..." Two ladies entered, seeing an apartment that was simple in design and decor, a TV and couch in one room, and a small table and fridge in the other... a small hallway led back into what appeared to be the bedroom.

"Miss Peach? Are you in here...?" Vert called as she walked down the hallway. Rei took a moment to clean her glasses off... Hearing a noise behind her, she turned...

...to see a tall suit of white armor, the helmet looking down on her. "AAIIIEEEEEEEEE!" the lawyer screamed as she fell on her rear end, scrambling away in fear.

"REI!" cried Vert as she ran back to the entrance, her spear at the ready. Upon seeing her, the armored soldier started frantically shaking his head and waving his hands, falling to his knees, before bowing down to the goddess, his helmet touching the floor. "Oh... I think he surrendered..." Putting her spear away, the CPU walked up to the man. "Stand up, please." The soldier complied, Vert noting that he had a black-and-white helmet with an orange visor. "Staff Sergeant DeRommer, I presume?"

"Mm-hmm," DeRommer nodded in affirmation.

Rei had managed to pick herself up by this point, walking over to Vert's side, though she was still shaking a bit after that scare. "Y-you should have kn-knocked first," she pointed out, as she tried to get her heart rate to calm down. DeRommer raised his arms in an apologetic shrug in response.

Vert then took out her mobile device, tapping on the screen. "I just sent you a text message... so just text back to me, so we can have a proper conversation." DeRommer nodded, taking out his own mobile device and texting...

'GREETINGS, LADY VERT. SORRY FOR SCARING YOUR FRIEND,' the message appeared on Vert's screen, the goddess lowering her arms slightly so Rei could read it as well.

"Apology accepted," the lawyer sighed.

"Why are you here?" Vert asked bluntly.

'I CAME TO OFFER CONDOLENCES TO PEACH AFTER ADRIAN'S ARREST,' the soldier explained. 'BUT SHE DOES NOT APPEAR TO BE HOME, DOES SHE?'

"No, it doesn't," sighed Vert. "I suppose we'll have to come back some other time..."

"W-we talked to some o-other soldiers in y-your unit," Rei said. "Apparently, y-you d-didn't take the n-news well either..."

'ADRIAN IS A GOOD MAN AND A FINE SOLDIER. I OWE MY LIFE TO HIM,' DeRommer texted in reply. 'HE DOES NOT KILL WITHOUT REASON. HE MUST HAVE BEEN SET UP SOMEHOW.'

"If it makes you feel any better, we've already discovered that the bullet that killed Klept O. Maniac could not have been fired from Adrian's weapon," Vert assured him.

"I-if he's been set up, then we'll find the truth," Rei affirmed.

DeRommer nodded. 'I THANK YOU FOR BELIEVING IN ADRIAN, LADY VERT AND HORNED FRIEND. I HOPE YOU INDEED FIND THE TRUTH.'

"M-my name is Rei, sergeant," the horned girl muttered.

"Anyway, we should be going," said Vert. "It's uncouth to be hanging around a lady's apartment when she's out, after all..." DeRommer nodded, putting away his mobile device, before saluting Vert and walking out.

"S-so, we're heading back to the Basilicom, then?" Rei asked.

"Yes, I think we've done all we can for today," the CPU nodded. "Perhaps we can relax with a gaming session before we retire for the night..."

"As long as we remember to set our alarms early for tomorrow," the lawyer agreed. "I don't want Adrian being convicted because we couldn't get there on time..."

With that, the two exited the apartment, to begin their trip home... tomorrow would be a busy day.

To be continued...


	3. Trial, Day 1

OK, here's the next chapter! There's a twist here a few of you saw coming, and another twist I'm almost certain you haven't! :D

Author Heart - Ance- Yeah, Vert loves her Yaoi doesn't she? _

Draen- You have to wonder how many 'undefeated prosecutors' Rei has dethroned in Lowee...

DaToskin- Rei has only transformed twice so far in my fanfic timeline, and both times she managed to maintain control by focusing on a clear goal first. But it's something she'll only do if she has no other choice.

ookami486- Well, you'll find out whether your guess was correct this chapter... :P

Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney

The Dead Thief's Turnabout

By Derald Snyder

Trial- Day 1

Court Record:

-Autopsy Report

-Woman's Footprints

-Peach's Trinket

 _August 17, 9:57 AM_

 _In The Air Above Leanbox City_

"This is all your fault, Lady Vert!" Rei Ryghts screamed over the wind as she was carried through the sky by Green Heart. "I told you to set your alarm! Now we're going to be late for the trial!"

"I'm sorry!" Green Heart yelled back. "I got busy with one of my MMOs and overslept! Why didn't you wake up early?!"

"Two words: jet lag!" Rei retorted. "And you wonder why I don't have much faith in you goddesses!" She tried desperately not to look down, as she was certain her breakfast would do gymnastics in her stomach if she did...

"Don't worry, we're almost there!" said Green Heart as they closed in on the Leanbox Army base where Adrian's trial was to take place...

 _August 17, 10:06 AM_

 _Leanbox Army Base_

 _Courtroom No. 1_

The courtroom doors gently opened, Rei walking into the courtroom, a slightly exhausted Vert trailing behind. The trial was indeed already under way, the defense attorney and prosecutor at their respective benches. General Lawson was in the judge's seat, apparently listening to an argument from the defense. He then banged his gavel.

"I see," he nodded. "So the defense is conceding the prosecution's argument is ironclad?"

(Wait, what?!) thought Rei.

"Yes, General," said the defense laywer, a thin man with a military buzzcut. "I can't really see any other possibility in this case..."

(The trial should have only just started!) Rei blinked incredulously. (He's giving up already?!)

"Heh heh heh," chuckled the prosecutor, a shorter man who was nonetheless well-built, with slightly tanned skin and a few scars dotting his face and exposed forearms, suggesting many years of combat experience. He had black eyes, and matching hair, though there were streaks of gray hair around his ears. "That's what I like about you, Lieutenant Ward. You know better than to pick a fight you know you can't win."

(That must be Colonel Cutter,) Rei observed. (Don't tell me the other guy's giving up just because of his reputation?!)

"But I didn't kill that guy!" Adrian protested from the defendant's chair.

"Silence, petty officer!" ordered Lawson. "You were not given permission to speak! Another outburst and I'll hold you in contempt of court!"

"Nnngghh..." Adrian groaned as he bowed his head.

"Of course, unlike the good lieutenant, some people just don't know when to quit," Colonel Cutter shook his head. "That kind of behavior gets you killed on the battlefield, boy..."

Seeing the distraught expression on Adrian's face caused Rei's heart to twist. (I... I can't watch this any longer!)

"Well then, if we're all in agreement, I shall pronounce my verdict now," stated the General. "This court finds the accused, Petty Officer Adrian Harold Johns..."

 _ **"OBJECTION!"**_

"Huh?" gasped Lt. Ward.

"W-what?!" cried Colonel Cutter.

"Ah!" Adrian's eyes lit up in recognition, as did the general's.

"Ms. Ryghts!" Lawson said in mild shock. "Where have you been?"

"Ryghts?" said Ward. "As in, Rei Ryghts?!"

"Wha-?! Rei Ryghts the psycho goddess?!" Cutter cried in surprise. The gallery immediately started chattering, a few soldiers standing, looking ready to draw their weapons...

"Order! Order! Stand down, soldiers!" yelled General Lawson as he banged his gavel several times. "This is no psycho goddess standing before us! Rei Ryghts has seen the error of her ways and now works as a lawyer! Calm down!" The gallery indeed calmed down somewhat, though there was still some muted conversation.

"A-a lawyer?!" Ward gasped.

"E-even so, she's got no right to interject herself in this here court-martial!" Cutter objected.

"I don't care if I'm breaking the rules!" Rei said defiantly as she walked to the defense's bench. "I just can't allow this miscarriage of justice to go on any longer!" She then turned to the lieutenant. "And you! You're supposed to be a DEFENSE attorney, aren't you? What the hell is wrong with you?!"

"B-but I can't see how anyone else could have d-done it!" Ward protested.

That only served to make Rei angrier. "Not even when there are clear contradictions in the evidence?! You're a disgrace to your profession, Lieutenant! If I was a military commander, I'd have you dismissed for incompetence!"

The thin man took a step back in fear. "B-but..."

 _"GET OUT OF MY SIGHT, YOU MISERABLE WORM!"_ Rei screamed with such ferocity, it was a wonder she didn't transform then and there.

"Ee... EEYAAAAAHHHH!" Ward screamed as he scrambled away from the furious bluenette, turning and running out of the courtroom as fast as his skinny legs could carry him.

"Lt. Ward!" the judge/general cried out.

Colonel Cutter could only shake his head and clap his hands. "Now *there's* a dressing down if I ever heard one..."

"General," Adrian spoke up, "I hereby dismiss Lieutenant Ward as my counsel due to cowardice. I request that Ms. Ryghts be allowed to take over my defense forthwith."

"B-but, Ms. Ryghts is a civilian lawyer..." General Lawson pointed out.

"Heh heh heh..." chuckled Cutter. "General, the prosecution has no objection."

"Colonel Cutter?" the general blinked in surprise.

"Admittedly, if we were facin' each other on an actual battlefield, I'd have reservations," the colonel began, "but matching wits with the psycho goddess here in the courtroom is another matter entirely." He looked Rei in the eye. "It'd be quite the feather in my cap to add Rei Ryghts to my list of legal conquests."

The lawyer in question put her hands on her hips, frowning. "I'd advise you not to underestimate me, Colonel. After all, I've scored several acquittals in Lowee's court system, as I'm sure the good general here knows."

"And if it helps everyone breathe easier, I shall stay by Rei's side for this trial," stated Vert as she walked to Rei's side, having finally recovered from her earlier exhaustion.

Lawson shook his head in disbelief. "This is completely unprecedented... but considering the circumstances, I suppose I can bend the rules just this once. The accused's request is hereby granted."

"Thank you, sir," Adrian sighed in relief.

"I thank you as well, Your Hon... er, General, sir," Rei added. (By some miracle, I got my foot in the door...)

"Now then, Ms. Ryghts. What was this 'clear contradiction' you were referring to earlier?" The general inquired.

"Well, first of all..." the lawyer began, "do you have the bullet that ended Mr. Klept O. Maniac's life?"

"Right here," said Cutter, holding up an evidence bag with said bullet inside. "Forensics determined it's a .338-caliber round, though neither we or the local leos could find the shell casing..."

*.338-Caliber Bullet added to the Court Record.*

"And how about the weapon that Petty Officer Johns had on him at the time of his surrender to authorities?" Rei continued.

"Got that, too," the colonel answered, holding up the assault rifle in question, which was wrapped in plastic. "And the only fingerprints on this gun are the petty officer's..."

*Assault Rifle added to the Court Record.*

"I already know what's coming next," Vert whispered in anticipation.

Rei rolled her eyes at the CPU briefly, before turning her attention to Adrian. "Tell me, Petty Officer, exactly what caliber is your assault rifle?"

"It's a .30-caliber rifle, ma'am," Adrian replied, a smirk on his face.

"W-wait, what? It's a .30-caliber?!" Cutter said in surprise.

"That's right," the former goddess nodded. "Tell me, General Lawson, what would happen if you tried to fire a .338 caliber round from a .30-caliber rifle?"

"Well, at best, the gun would jam," answered Lawson. "At worst, you'd completely wreck your firearm!"

"Which means," Rei exclaimed triumphantly, "that the assault rifle the defendant had on his person at the time of the murder... could *not* have been the gun that ended Klept O. Maniac's life!"

"Gahhhh!" cried Colonel Cutter, recoiling as if he'd been shot, putting a hand to his shoulder. "I-I've been winged... by a civilian of all people!" The gallery started chattering at this...

"Order! Order!" yelled the general, banging his gavel. "Well, this is quite a conundrum. If the petty officer's rifle didn't fire that bullet, then what did?"

"Isn't it obvious, Your Hon- *ahem* general?" Rei shook her head. "The bullet must have come from a different gun... one used by someone else entirely!"

"OBJECTION!" cried Colonel Cutter, banging the bench with his fist. "You're jumpin' the gun, civilian! Just 'cause the bullet doesn't match, doesn't mean you can lay the blame on some mysterious other person just like that!"

"But I have proof," Rei countered.

"You do?" General Lawson's eyes went wide.

The lawyer nodded. "Lady Vert and I canvassed the crime scene yesterday, and found something quite interesting at the other end of the alley! TAKE THAT!" She called up the photo of the footprints on her mobile device, before handing it to the bailiff, who handed to the general.

"Are these... footprints?" asked Lawson.

"That's right, General," Rei nodded. "We found these at the other end of the alley where the thief met his end... specifically, the right end."

"The right end?" Lawson muttered in confusion. "Are you telling me the alleyway splits in two directions?"

"Ah, c'mon, General, don't tell me you forgot the crime scene diagram I showed you earlier..." Cutter groaned in dismay, holding up said diagram in his hand. "You can see right here, the alley ends when it insects with another alley which goes west and east... or left and right, if ya wanna keep it simple."

"O-oh, right... now I remember," The judge/general nodded. "I must have been too focused on where the body was found..."

*Crime Scene Diagram added to the Court Record.*

"We've determined that the footprints must belong to a woman," said Vert. "Also, we've made the reasonable assumption that said woman isn't what you'd call a delicate flower, especially if she's the one who beat and shot Rickard Hauser."

"But there are plenty of women like that in this entire game series, as you know full well, Lady Vert," Lawson countered. "How would we be able to even narrow down the list?"

(Hey, wait a minute, I thought only major characters could break the fourth wall like that!) Rei groaned inwardly.

"Heh heh heh..." chuckled Cutter. "Well, seems that one guy who wanted to testify wasn't whistlin' dixie after all."

"Testify?" said Rei. "You mean, you have a witness?"

"I do *now*, thanks to your evidence," the colonel/prosecutor asserted. "I didn't feel like callin' 'im at first, 'cause I figured his story was hogwash... after all, Petty Officer Johns' partner would go to any length to help him out, you know..."

"P...partner?" gasped Rei.

"Staff Sergeant DeRommer, front n' center!" yelled Cutter, banging his fist for emphasis.

(Sergeant DeRommer... is a witness?!) the lawyer thought in disbelief, as the man in question came up to the witness stand, carrying what appeared to be a keyboard, which he gently set down on the stand.

"State your name and rank for the record, soldier," the colonel ordered.

The armored man nodded and began typing, a holo-screen appearing in front of him which displayed the text: 'NAME: PELLEAS C. DEROMMER. RANK: STAFF SERGEANT. I ASSIST WITH CLOSE QUARTERS COMBAT INSTRUCTION.'

"HOLD IT!" Rei slammed her fists on the bench. "Sergeant, why didn't you tell me and Lady Vert you were a witness yesterday?!"

The staff sergeant rubbed the back of his helmet briefly, before typing: 'I WOULD HAVE SAID SOMETHING, BUT LADY VERT SAID WE SHOULD LEAVE. SO I DID.'

"Oh dear," sighed Vert, shaking her head. "Perhaps I shouldn't have been so hasty..."

Colonel Cutter just rolled his eyes. "Get on with your testimony, Sergeant."

'YES SIR,' DeRommer typed. 'I WAS OFF-DUTY HANGING AROUND THE AIRPORT IN CASUAL DRESS, WHEN I HEARD SOME COMMOTION. IT WAS A LEANBOX SOLDIER- ADRIAN, CHASING A MAN IN RAGS. I FOLLOWED FROM A DISTANCE, SEEING IF THERE WAS ANY WAY FOR ME TO CUT OFF THE THIEF'S ESCAPE. THAT'S WHEN I SAW SOMEONE RUN INTO AN ALLEY. IT WAS A WOMAN, WITH LIGHT COLORED HAIR, DRESSED IN YELLOW AND BLACK. I TRIED TO FOLLOW, BUT WAS CUT OFF BY A GARBAGE TRUCK. SHE MUST HAVE BEEN THE ONE WHO BEAT UP AND SHOT THE THIEF! WHEN THE POLICE ARRIVED, I REALIZED THERE WAS NOTHING I COULD DO, SO I LEFT.' DeRommer stood at ease, indicating he was finished.

"Hmmmm..." General Lawson pondered. "So you tried to pursue the thief yourself, in order to help your partner, but you were cut off..."

'YES SIR,' DeRommer typed. 'UNFORTUNATELY I DID NOT SEE THE MOMENT OF THE MURDER, WHICH IS LIKELY WHY THE COLONEL DISCOUNTED MY TESTIMONY AT FIRST.'

"That, and it seemed a little too convenient," muttered the prosecutor. "But I suppose that's what cross-examination is for, right civilian?"

Lawson nodded. "Indeed. The defense will now cross-examine the witness."

"I don't like this," Vert muttered to herself. "Everything seems to be going our way... it's almost *too* easy."

"I know what you mean," Rei nodded in response. (Because that usually means we're walking into a trap... but all we can do is push forward.) Clearing her throat, she addressed the witness, "Well, first of all, I'd like to ask... what exactly were you doing at the airport anyway, Sergeant?"

'ADRIAN TOLD ME ABOUT HIS JOB ESCORTING LADY VERT'S GUEST, THAT IS, YOU YOURSELF,' DeRommer responded. 'I THOUGHT THAT AFTER ADRIAN WAS FINISHED, HE AND I COULD HANG OUT TOGETHER FOR A SHORT BIT. I... REALLY DON'T HAVE TOO MANY FRIENDS BESIDES ADRIAN...'

"Well, maybe if you weren't so shy all the time..." Adrian muttered from the defendant's chair.

(Sounds reasonable enough so far,) thought Rei. "But why didn't you try to get around the garbage truck? Was it *that* close to the wall?"

DeRommer hesitated a moment, before typing, 'WELL, IT CERTAINLY LOOKED THAT WAY...'

"OBJECTION!" came the cry. However, it came not from Rei Ryghts, but...

"L-Lady Vert?!" the judge/general gasped in surprise. "You have a problem with the witness' testimony?"

"I do, General," Vert nodded. "So, Sergeant DeRommer, you claim that you didn't see the murder itself, yet you knew that the victim was savagely beaten just before being shot. That detail was never released to the general public..."

'I FOUND OUT FROM LISTENING TO THE TRIAL BEFORE BEING CALLED AS A WITNESS,' DeRommer retorted.

The Leanbox CPU shook her head. "Shame on you, trying to lie to your goddess right to her face. We talked with some of your fellow soldiers yesterday," she recounted, " and they said something very interesting. They told me that when they texted you about what happened with Petty Officer Johns, that your response was, 'It's a lie, he didn't beat up and shoot anyone, that not the Adrian I know.'"

"...!" Sweat started dripping from under DeRommer's helmet.

"Ahh!" Rei gasped in surprise. (I'd completely forgotten about that!)

Vert then slapped her gloved hand on the bench a la Edgeworth. "So tell me, Sergeant, how *did* you know that detail when you supposedly never saw the actual murder?!"

'LD';';F'J'URU CNXNHUFUHLN?!' DeRommer typed in panic, sending the crowd into a tizzy, forcing General Lawson to bang his gavel.

"Order! Order!" cried the general.

"Are you saying the witness was lyin' in his testimony just now?!" protested Cutter, sweating slightly.

"O-of course that's what we're saying!" Rei blurted out quickly. (I can't let Vert show me up here, *I'm* supposed to be the defense attorney!) "And there's a perfectly good explanation for that!"

"There is?" Lawson blinked.

(There's only one plausible explanation... but that would mean...!) Shaking her head, Rei slammed her fists on the bench. "Sergeant DeRommer! It was *you* who ducked into the alley before the garbage truck blocked it off, weren't you?!"

"OBJECTION!" cried Colonel Cutter. "Yer off your rocker, civilian! You yourself proved that it had to be a *woman* that ran out the east end of the alley!"

The lawyer just nodded. "Exactly."

"...!" Cutter's eyes went wide. "W-wait, you ain't sayin'...?!"

"That's right!" The lawyer pointed at the sergeant. "The witness standing before us, is in fact, a woman!"

"Graaaahhh!" DeRommer recoiled as if he'd been hit with an uppercut.

"A woman?!" gasped the judge/general. The crowd started chattering...

'WAIT A MINUTE!' DeRommer started typing again. 'YOU'RE SAYING I'M A GIRL JUST BECAUSE OF SOME FOOTPRINTS?!'

"Not just the footprints," Rei Ryghts shook her head. "No-one in your unit has seen you outside of your armor... you've never even removed your helmet... probably because there's a very pretty female face underneath! And your story about being a mute is also a lie! More likely, you just can't convincingly ape a male voice! Thus the fabrication about an injury to your throat!"

"Hmmm..." Lawson closed his eyes. "Yes, that does seem rather suspicious..."

"But if Sergeant DeRommer is a woman, why would she go to all that trouble to hide her gender?" Vert asked.

"You may not agree with this, Lady Vert..." said the general, "and this may perhaps may be outmoded, but the current rule is that women cannot be allowed in frontline combat positions in this army. Yet Sergeant DeRommer has been on the front lines almost since the day he joined. If it were discovered that he was in fact, a she, then she would be immediately discharged from service."

Cutter cut in, "But if that's true, then how the heck did she get through the process of joining the army without being discovered in the first place?!"

"...She had help," Rei stated simply. "Help from someone who knew the system inside and out."

"And who would that be?" inquired Lawson.

The former goddess sighed in slight exasperation. "Isn't it obvious, sir? It's the person that's closer to DeRommer than anyone else... his only friend... the defendant, Petty Officer Adrian Harold Johns!"

"Groooooh!" DeRommer recoiled again.

"HOLD IT!" Adrian yelled in protest. "Lady Vert, you know me pretty well! You *know* I wouldn't put my own career on the line like that! Especially not for some random woman!"

"W-well, that's true..." muttered the CPU.

"Maybe not for *any* woman..." Rei pondered... but then something occurred to her. "But maybe you would do it for *your* woman..."

"M-my woman?" Adrian grunted, sweating slightly.

Rei then turned to Vert. "Lady Vert, you remember where we first met Sergeant DeRommer, don't you?"

"Of course," Vert nodded. "It was at Adrian's girlfriend's apartment... but she wasn't home."

"Wrong, Lady Vert," Rei disagreed. "She *was* home... we just didn't recognize her, because she was all decked out in her shiny white armor!"

"W-what?!" the CPU gasped, her eyes shrinking to white circles. "But that means...!"

"That's right!" The horned lawyer slammed her fists on the bench again. "General, the defense portends that Staff Sergeant DeRommer, and the defendant's girlfriend Peach... are in fact one and the same!"

'UR9F8HVJZXCLKJARVKVSUSHKJN!' DeRommer panic-typed again.

The gallery was restless, to say the least. "DeRommer and Peach are one and the same?" "No way, man! I've met Peach before!" "But they've never been seen together, have they?" "Could it be...? Are they really...?"

"Order! Order in the court!" cried Lawson as he banged his gavel in rapid succession. "If order is not restored, I'll make you all drop and give me 50!" That quieted the crowd quickly.

DeRommer let out a loud roar of rage as he slammed his hands on the witness stand, narrowly missing his keyboard, before furiously typing, 'I OBJECT! THIS IS JUST INSANE RAMBLING FROM THE PSYCHO GODDESS!'

"And just how is it insane, MISS DeRommer?" Rei challenged.

'EVIDENCE IS EVERYTHING IN A COURT OF LAW! EVEN *I* KNOW THAT!' the sergeant retorted. 'BUT YOU DON'T HAVE ANY PROOF THAT I AM PEACH! NOT EVEN ONE TINY SPECK!'

"Y-yeah, what he said!" Adrian supplemented. "I demand the defense show proof of their claim, or I'll demand that this entire discourse be stricken from the record!"

"Meep..." squeaked Rei, sweating.

"Heh heh heh..." chuckled Colonel Cutter. "It seems the petty officer and his partner have thrown down the gauntlet, civilian. Now, do you have any ammunition to respond with?"

"Oh, dear..." Vert sighed. "We don't have anything that definitively proves DeRommer is Peach, do we? After all, the possibility didn't even occur to us until recently..."

General Lawson then banged his gavel. "The witness raises a fair point. Without proof, your assertion is no more than flimsy conjecture... so, does the defense have any evidence to offer?"

"O-of course we do, Your Honor- er, General!" Rei answered.

"W-we do?" Vert blinked in surprise.

Cutter just shook his head. "You're not soundin' very confident, defense... and I know a bluff when I see one."

(Well, he's right in a sense...) Rei thought to herself. (But even if it *is* a bluff, it's all we've got!)

A gavel sounded. "Well then, I suppose it's time to call the defense's bluff, then," Lawson nodded. "The defense will present their evidence at this time."

'IF YOU EVEN HAVE ANY, THAT IS,' typed DeRommer.

The lawyer took a deep breath to calm herself. "My evidence... is right here! TAKE THAT!" She presented Peach's trinket.

"What is that?" asked the general. "It looks something like a rose..."

"It's a trinket that Adrian got as a gift for his girlfriend," Rei explained.

"And how does that prove your theory?" Cutter scoffed.

(Here goes nothing...) "It's all over for you, Sergeant," Rei stated firmly. "Because this trinket was found dropped next to the dead body at the crime scene!"

"WHHAAAAAAAA-?!" DeRommer let loose with a high-pitched scream as he recoiled again.

"HOLD IT!" screamed Adrian. "I was the one that gave that trinket to you! How did you know it was dropped at the crime scene?!"

Rei just gave her trademark 'psycho smirk'. "Well, I know *now*, Adrian, since you were nice enough to confess!"

"AYAAAAAAAAGH!" cried Adrian, his hands on his cheeks as his head tilted to one side.

"Gaaahhh!" cried Colonel Cutter, once again acting like he'd been shot. The gallery once again erupted into chatter.

"Order! Order! Order in the court!" cried General Lawson as he gaveled the crowd down.

"W-well, I must say," Vert stuttered slightly, "that was a beautifully played bluff, Rei. Even better, it turned out to be true!"

"Nnnrrrrgghh..." moaned the sergeant, sweat dripping from under the helmet, her hands gripping her head.

"Now then, Sergeant," Lawson addressed the witness, "I believe this farce has gone on long enough. I order you to remove your helmet and show your true identity this instant!"

"Nnn... nnnnn... NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" DeRommer screamed, recoiling so far back, it was a wonder she didn't fall over completely. As she did, her helmet slid off her head, clattering to the floor. The armored soldier then righted herself, revealing a very pretty female face, with large, expressive blue eyes, and strawberry-blonde hair going down to her shoulders, some of it pulled back into a ponytail by two small red bobbles. "No, no, no, no! This can't be happening...! I've... I've been found out!" she spoke in a very cute feminine voice. Tears began welling up in her eyes. "I... I'm sorry, Adrian! I can't fight alongside you anymoooooooore!" She began bawling, streams of tears going down her cheeks. The gallery began chattering in confused disbelief.

"My word! You really are a woman!" The general's eyes were wide with shock.

"...Witness. Tell us your real name," Rei ordered solemnly.

*snif* "M-my... my name is... Peach C. Macintosh. I'm Adrian's girlfriend. 'DeRommer' was my father's name, but when he ran out on us, my Mom reverted to her maiden name, as did I." Peach then chuckled bitterly. "I didn't even realize I'd dropped that trinket from Adrian until just now..."

"P-Peashy..." Adrian sighed in an apologetic tone.

"Peashy?!" gasped Vert, her eyes once again shrunk to white circles, causing Rei to glance over at the CPU in confusion.

General Lawson heaved a sigh. "Well, Miss Macintosh, I can say one thing for certain- your military career is indeed over. However, you may yet avoid a dishonorable discharge if you tell us the whole and complete truth, starting now."

"Y-yes sir," sighed Peach. "I-I confess... I was the one that beat up the thief. B-but I didn't kill him! I swear I didn't!" she insisted.

"Then what happened?" Cutter pressed.

"W-well... what I said before was kinda true... I was trying to help Adrian by heading that thief off at the pass. I just managed to get in the west end of the alley before that garbage truck blocked it off... I made a quick right, and that thief literally ran right into me..."

("And just where do you think *you're* going?")

("Waaaaah!")

(*POW! THWACK! THUNK! KICK!* *thud*)

Peach punched a hand into her fist. "I gave that fool a beating he'd never forget! But as I was standing over his prone body... BLAM! A gunshot rang out! I have no idea where it came from... I saw the thief's head jerk, and then he went limp. Adrian arrived not a second later..."

("Peach! What are you doing here?!")

("Adrian! I... I didn't...")

("You're lucky I got here first. Go on, run! I'll cover for you!")

("Th-thank you!")

"I fled out the east end, since the other end was still blocked off by the garbage truck," Peach said. "After that, I went home... I figured Adrian wouldn't get in too much trouble, given the victim was a notorious thief... so you can imagine my shock when our fellow soldiers texted me about his arrest. I was so upset... I didn't know what to do... Then I got an idea. I'd go to court and testify as Sergeant DeRommer, to try and take suspicion off my boyfriend. I was just getting my helmet on when Lady Vert and Rei Ryghts came in. I just managed to hide myself from view, and then snuck behind Rei, trying to make it look like I'd come in right behind them." She then looked over at the defense's bench. "Honestly, if you two had come in even a minute earlier, the jig would've been up right then and there."

"So that's why I didn't hear you come in..." Rei sighed.

"I'm really sorry for scaring you like that," Peach apologized. "I didn't mean it..."

General Lawson then banged his gavel. "Well, it seems we have the whole story now. Colonel, what do you make of this?"

"Hmph," Cutter grunted. "Well, I believe the part where she says she beat up the victim, at least. But if what she says is true..." He banged his fist on the bench. "Then the only possible culprit is the accused, Petty Officer Johns!"

"OBJECTION!" cried Rei. "How can you say that?"

"There's only two directions an alley can go, civilian, unless you're a ghost! And since I don't believe in superstitions, that could only mean either the petty officer or his girlfriend did it!"

"No, no, no!" cried Peach. "I told you, the gunshot rang out just before Adrian arrived!"

"And how do you know he didn't just shoot the victim from a distance?" Cutter retorted.

"OBJECTION!" Rei protested. "The autopsy report contradicts your assertion, Colonel!"

"How so?" Cutter challenged.

"The position of the victim's head," Rei clarified, "suggests that the shot that killed him came from straight above. Meaning, the shooter would have had to have been standing directly over Klept O. Maniac when he was shot! Something that Adrian could not have done even with the short distance he was from the body at the time!"

"OBJECTION!" asserted the colonel/prosecutor. "Even if what you say is true, that doesn't mean you can take this lady's gabbing as gospel! She's lied once, she'll lie again to keep suspicion off her boyfriend!"

"No, I'm telling the truth now, I swear!" Peach protested.

"Even if she is lying," Rei pointed out, "You're still forgetting that the bullet found in the victim's skull doesn't match to the weapon the accused had on him when he surrendered!"

"Ah," Lawson nodded, "It looks like we've come all the way back around to the original contradiction- the non-matching bullet. It seems after all this, we still haven't found a satisfactory explanation for this..."

Colonel Cutter shook his head. "Speak for yourself, General... I've got a perfectly rational way of explanin' it!"

"Y-you do?" the general blinked in surprise.

"It's quite simple," said Cutter. "The accused used a different firearm to kill the victim!"

"OBJECTION!" Rei and Vert cried out simultaneously. The two women looked at each other for a moment, before Rei motioned for the CPU to go ahead. *Ahem* "Colonel, I'm fairly certain that Adrian wasn't carrying anything other than that assault rifle when we arrived at the airport..."

The grazened officer hesitated for a moment, before responding, "With all due respect, Lady Vert... you're only 'fairly' certain?"

"I-I'm pretty sure I didn't see any other firearms on his person," Vert asserted, though her voice wavered slightly. "After all, we were just escorting Ms. Ryghts here from the airport..."

"But you didn't, say, scan him from top to bottom?" Cutter gently pressed.

"W-well, no..."

"So, the possibility exists that maybe Petty Officer Johns was carrying another firearm... one with a similar color to his armor, perhaps, which would explain why you missed it!" the prosecutor asserted.

"OBJECTION!" cried Rei, slamming her fists on the bench. "Then what happened to this gun after the crime was committed? No other firearms were discovered at the scene!"

"You're right," Cutter agreed. "But that's because the gun was taken away from the scene and disposed of elsewhere, by an accomplice!" He leaned slightly over the bench. "Ain't that right... Miss Peach?"

"Huh?" Peach blinked in confusion. "W-wait, what? Me?!"

"Wh-what?!" gasped Vert.

"HOLD IT!" cried Rei. "You're saying *Peach* disposed of the other firearm? That's insane! Why would she do that?!"

"Th-that's right!" the blonde asserted. "I-I can't use a gun to save my life! I'm not even allowed to carry one!"

"OBJECTION!" The colonel banged his fist on the bench. "Stop tryin' to confuse the court, witness! Ya don't have to know how to *use* a gun if you're just carrying it away from the crime scene! And it's already proven that you'd do *anything* for yer boyfriend's sake!"

"Nooooooo!" Peach recoiled in dismay.

"Stop it!" yelled Adrian. "Peach has nothing to do with this!"

General Lawson banged his gavel. "What did I tell you about speaking out of turn, petty officer?!"

"Nnnnnnggghhh..." Adrian bowed his head and gritted his teeth.

Cutter stated confidently, "The prosecution's assertion is as follows: Petty Officer Johns and his girlfriend cornered the victim, Klept O. Maniac, in the middle of a dark alley, in a classic pincer movement. Then Miss Peach viciously assaulted the victim and held him down, while Johns delivered the killing shot! Then the petty officer gave his gun to Miss Peach, who fled the scene and disposed of the weapon somewhere far away, probably in the river!" He banged his fist on the bench again. "It was all part of their plan take suspicion off the petty officer by having him surrender with a gun that didn't match the bullet!"

"No, no, no, noooooo!" wailed the blonde, once again holding her head in her hands.

"Urk!" grunted Rei in disbelief. (I want to object... but his explanation perfectly fits the facts!)

"I believe the proper phrase here is, 'We've been suckered'," muttered Vert. "That's not the sort of theory you just come up with on the spot. The colonel's been playing us like a violin!"

"Heh heh heh... as sharp as ever, Lady Vert," Cutter smirked. "After all, did you really think I didn't know about the bullet and gun not matching? Or the footprints at the east end of the alley? I suspected an accomplice from the very beginning!" He shook his head. "But I had no way of provin' that, or who it might be... until you so graciously did it for me, Rei Ryghts!"

"AAAAAHHHH!" cried the lawyer in shock. (I... I played right into his hands!)

Colonel Cutter then pointed his index finger at Rei like a gun, before 'shooting' it. "Now do you see why they call me 'the undefeated colonel of the courtroom'? You never stood a chance on this battlefield, civilian!"

"Hrrrrrrgghh..." Rei grunted, sweating profusely.

General Lawson then banged his gavel. "It would seem that the prosecution's claim, while somewhat flimsy, is the only plausible explanation of what happened. Does the defense have any objections?"

"Rei, please! You have to do something!" Vert pleaded. "Otherwise, both Adrian AND Peashy will be found guilty!"

(I want to!) the lawyer thought desperately, (but I can't think of anything!)

"Now, now, Lady Vert..." Cutter began, "I think even your lawyer knows it's time to lay down arms and surrender. There simply isn't any other way to explain what happened! Unless you think the bullet that killed that thief came down from the sky, like divine retribution from heaven?" The colonel started guffawing at his joke...

"OBJECTION!" Vert cut him off, slapping her hand on the bench. "Kindly watch how you use the term 'divine retribution' in *my* presence, Colonel!"

"Gkkk!" Cutter choked as he tried to restrain his laughter. "Guh... heh heh... s-sorry, Lady Vert... no offense meant..."

(Is that *really* worth objecting over, Vert?) Rei groaned inwardly... but then, an idea dawned on her... (Wait a minute... divine retribution... from the sky?) The lawyer gasped as a sudden epiphany hit her. (That's it! That has to be it!)

The judge/general then banged his gavel. "Now then, if the comedy portion of this trial is over, I would like to pronounce my verdict..."

 _"OBJECTION!"_ cried Rei, pointing her finger at Lawson. "Not so fast, General! I have a rebuttal!"

"Oh, geez louise..." Cutter groaned. "You keep tryin' to fight back, even though you're clean outta ammo..."

"Not quite yet, Colonel!" the former goddess shook her head. "I still have one last salvo!" (This really is my last chance... if I can't make this work, it's game over!)

"Alright, but this had better be good, Ms. Ryghts," sighed Lawson. "Now, what is your rebuttal?"

"Well, going back to what the good colonel said earlier," Rei began, "about the bullet coming from the sky..."

"OBJECTION!" Cutter interrupted. "Come on, Ryghts! I was talkin' out my ass there!"

"Watch your language, Colonel..." sighed Vert.

"I don't care where you were talking out of!" Rei said defiantly. "It's perfectly plausible the bullet actually came from up above!"

"Ms. Ryghts, please," groaned General Lawson, "This is no time for such desperation! You're honestly going to try saying the bullet fell from the sky?!"

"O-of course it didn't fall!" Rei moaned, "It was shot from a gun, like any other bullet!"

"So what, are ya saying some nut from a helicopter shot and killed Mr. Rickard Hauser?" Colonel Cutter mocked.

Rei shook her head. "Not from a helicopter... from the rooftop! Remember, the shot came from directly above! Isn't it plausible that someone could have fired a gun from way up on the rooftop and killed the victim that way?"

"OBJECTION! Even if it is plausible, what the heck would somebody be doin' all the way up there to begin with?" The colonel/prosecutor argued.

Rei just gave a sinister smirk in response. "Well, if this hadn't been a military court-martial, I might never have thought of it. Tell, me, Colonel... does the word 'sniper' mean anything to you?"

"S-sniper?" Cutter was starting to sweat now.

Lawson closed his eyes. "Ms. Ryghts, are you honestly suggesting that a trained sniper was stationed on one of the rooftops... with the express purpose of killing Mr. Hauser?!"

"Yes, sir," Rei nodded. "And there's a piece of evidence that corroborates my theory... namely, the very bullet itself!"

"OBJECTION!" Colonel Cutter banged his fist on the bench. "How does the bullet itself prove the existence of a sniper?!"

"Because neither JAG nor the local police could find the shell casing, remember?" the lawyer pointed out. "We assumed it was because the shooter had policed his brass... but tell me, wouldn't it be hard for anyone to find a shell casing in that dark alley, in the short interval of time between the gunshot and when Lady Vert and I arrived on the scene?"

"Good point," muttered Adrian, "I only found Peach's trinket by dumb luck, myself..."

"But what if the shell casing wasn't actually ejected from its gun in that alley?" Rei continued her argument. "What if, instead... it was ejected on the rooftop? That would explain why nobody could find it! Because Mr. Rickard T. Hauser was killed not Petty Officer Adrian... but by a sniper's bullet!"

"Aaaaagghh!" cried Cutter, recoiling as if he'd been shot again. "D-dammit! A sniper ambush! I didn't even consider that! Fall back, men! Find cover!" The gallery started chattering wildly at this.

"Order! Order! Order!" cried Lawson, banging his gavel.

"Something tells me the good colonel wasn't acting *that* time," Vert observed with a satisfied smirk. "Well done, Rei."

Rei slammed her fists on the bench again. "General Lawson, sir! The defense hereby requests that the rooftops be thoroughly investigated! If the victim was indeed killed by a sniper, they may have left evidence behind up there!"

"Hmmmmm... I agree." Lawson nodded, before banging his gavel. "It appears a new possibility has emerged in this case. The victim, Klept O. Maniac, may in fact have been shot by a sniper. Therefore, I am suspending proceedings for today while this new angle is looked into. Does the prosecution have any objections?"

"Grrrrr..." Colonel Cutter growled. "Not bad, civilian! It seems you've won this skirmish. But the war is far from over! Until we meet again!" He then retreated from the prosecution's bench in a crouching sprint, like a soldier under heavy fire.

"Thank g-goodness..." Peashy sighed, partially collapsing over the witness stand.

"I'll take that as a no," sighed the general. "So be it. We shall resume tomorrow at 0930 hours sharp. And I suggest you set your alarm this time, Ms. Ryghts."

"Y-yes, sir..." Rei groaned.

Lawson then banged his gavel one last time. "That's all for today, troops. Dismissed!"

To be continued...

Mwahahahahaha! Bet you didn't expect DeRommer/Peach to be the Hyper Dimension's PEASHY, did you?! She's kinda like Ultra Dimension Nep in that she's no CPU, but she's all grown up and can still kick butt! As always, don't forget to review!


	4. Investigation, Day 2

Finally, at long last, the next chapter has arrived! Enjoy, everyone!

DaToskin- No, Adult Neptune says 'Plu-' at one point when talking about the ruler of her original home. Clearly she's referring to Plutia, which means Big Nep hails from the Ultradimension.

Author Heart- Ance/ookami486/GX Latias- *Light Yagami face* Just as planned.

Drean- Keep reading the chapter to find out whether your theory is correct...

Gigarot- Oh, don't worry, Vert will expound on her reaction this chapter...

Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney

The Dead Thief's Turnabout

By Derald Snyder

Investigation- Day 2

Court Record:

-Autopsy Report

-Woman's Footprints

-Peach's Trinket

-Crime Scene Diagram

-.30-Caliber Assault Rifle

-.338-Caliber Bullet

 _August 17, 12:49 PM_

 _Leanbox Basilicom_

 _Vert's Room_

Rei had to consciously control herself to keep from scarfing down her sandwich without chewing properly. "Well, if there's one thing you do right as a goddess, it's that you make a wicked sandwich."

"Coming from you, I probably should take that as a compliment," sighed Vert. "Though, I was somewhat surprised to see the way you acted in the courtroom... it's like you were almost a completely different person! I don't think I heard you stutter even once!"

Rei just smiled wryly. "Well, I guess... the c-courtroom is where I'm m-most c-comfortable th-these days..." She took another bite of her sandwich. "S-so, what's our n-next move?"

"Hmmm..." Vert pursed her lips as she pondered. "Well, I would like to check out the rooftops above the crime scene, but that Colonel Cutter is probably tearing the place apart right now... Perhaps for now, we should head back to the base and visit Adrian. I want to make sure there isn't anything else he's 'conveniently' forgot to mention to us..."

"Y-you do realize... *gulp* that he was j-just trying t-to protect his girlfriend..." Rei pointed out as she swallowed the last of her sandwich. "But yes, we probably should talk to him again anyway..."

 _August 17_

 _Leanbox Military Base_

 _Brig- Visiting Room_

Rei and Vert once again sat down at a table while they waited for their client to be brought in. Soon enough, Adrian walked in and sat down, a slightly guilty look on his face. "Hello, Lady Vert... and Ms. Ryghts."

"Adrian. You lied to me... to us," Vert stated gently but firmly.

The petty officer bowed his head. "I did... I'm sorry." He looked up again. "But, as Ms. Ryghts stated in court today, I'd do anything for my woman..."

"Even break the rules to get her into a combat position in your unit?" Rei pointed out.

Adrian heaved a sigh. "Well, it wasn't just because she wanted to fight alongside me... let me put it this way- I couldn't let a natural talent in hand-to-hand combat like hers go to waste. And seeing her in action on the battlefield proved me right."

"I see..." Vert nodded.

"Anything else you might have 'conveniently' forgot to mention to us, petty officer?" Rei pressed.

"I swear to you, Peach being there was the only thing I lied about," Adrian asserted, shaking his head. "Everything else I said was the honest truth..." He ran his hands through his hair, heaving a sigh. "You idiot, Peashy... if she'd just testified as herself and not Sergeant DeRommer, she wouldn't have been kicked out of the army... Don't tell her I said that," he added quickly.

"We won't," Vert promised. "Are you sure there's nothing else you can tell us?"

Adrian bit his lip. "Nothing about the crime itself... But I could tell you the reason I think that I'm being court-martialed and not tried in a civilian court..."

"W-what do y-you mean?" asked Rei.

The soldier rubbed his temples. "Well, I think I might've pissed off a few of the higher-ups... pardon my french, Lady Vert," he apologized.

"How did that happen?" the goddess inquired.

"Well, when *I* first joined, I was kinda shocked to see that the soldiers didn't seem to be taking their training seriously," Adrian explained. "When I brought this up with my immediate superior, he was all, 'Oh, well, we're just NPCs, we always get annihilated anyway when a big threat shows up, while Neptune and the other goddesses save the day,'" his voice took on a disgusted, sarcastic undertone. "I mean, come on! What kind of twisted logic is that?!"

"The logic of a gamer," Vert stated simply. "Not to disagree with you, Adrian, but I do understand where he's coming from, somewhat..."

"Well I didn't!" the petty officer retorted, "and I *still* don't! We're the Leanbox ARMY, for crying out loud! We're supposed to be the first line of defense when a big threat shows up! I mean, even if they *are* too much for us, we could at least take out the mooks and minions and make your jobs as CPUs a little easier! I mean, I know, level grinding and all that, but isn't that what Quests and dungeons are for?"

"You make a fair point," Vert conceded. "But the higher-ups didn't agree?"

"The fact that I've been passed over for promotion several times should speak for itself," Adrian muttered. "Not that I mind too much, I prefer to be on the front lines anyway. Not to mention, set an example for the rest of the company to look up to... which is another reason I brought Peashy in."

"J-just a minute," Rei interrupted. "When Lady Vert and I came t-to the t-training grounds yesterday, i-it looked like there w-were q-quite a few soldiers working hard..."

"Yes, and most of those soldiers were likely from my own unit," Adrian countered. "I may not be the official head of my unit, but I'm practically the de facto second-in-command. When I tell my fellow soldiers to get off their butts and get to work, they listen. I can say with confidence that my unit is the best trained and prepared in in the entire local company... if not the whole army."

"With all due respect, Adrian, that's why I hand-picked you to escort Rei from the airport in the first place," Vert pointed out.

"And I thank you for your recognition of my efforts, milady," Adrian bowed slightly. "If only the higher-ups were as open-minded as you were... but alas, I fear they've taken my criticisms as a personal insult. So, when they heard about this incident, I'd bet they were chomping at the bit to have a chance to get me out of their hair for good..."

"Y-you seriously th-think that someone i-in the higher echelons o-of the army h-has a p-personal vendetta against you f-for wanting th-the Leanbox Army to b-be more th-than cannon fodder?" Rei stuttered out.

"That would be terribly petty, if true," sighed Vert. "Which is why we must get you cleared with all due haste..." Her mobile device then rang. "Oh, I wonder who that could be..." She pulled it out and answered. "Hello...? Oh, Detective Green! What is it? ...They're done searching the rooftops? Oh, the western rooftop, you say? I see. Very well, we shall be there momentarily." She hung up. "Well, I suppose that's our cue..." She stood up, Rei and Adrian following.

"If it's not too much trouble..." Adrian requested, "could you go and check on Peach for me later? She can't be in a very good mood right now..."

"Certainly," Vert nodded.

"J-just as long as I d-don't g-get the daylights s-scared out of m-me again..." muttered the horned lawyer...

 _August 16_

 _Outside Leanbox Airport Parking Lot_

 _Western Rooftop_

The door to the roof opened, Detective Eddie Green emerging first followed by Rei and the CPU. "Here we are, ladies."

"Doesn't look like there's much up here, does it?" Vert observed.

"JAG's already been over this area with a fine-toothed comb," Eddie stated. "There probably isn't much left to find..."

"S-so we get Colonel Cutter's leftovers," sighed Rei. "M-might as well g-get to it then..."

Vert nodded in agreement. "Well, first of all... Did JAG find any shell casings in the area?"

"Not a one," the detective sighed.

"Well, that's no good... wait, what is that?" the CPU inquired, pointing to something that had been marked off near the edge of the roof. The trio walked over...

"Looks like a footprint somebody left in the sand gathered by the edge," Detective Green observed. "It must have been left recently, or else the sand would have shifted and messed it up by now."

"It looks pretty big," muttered Rei as she pulled out her mobile device to take a picture.

"Well, from eye-balling it, I'd say it's about a men's size-15 or so," muttered the detective...

(sh-click!) *Size-15 Footprint added to the Court Record.*

"So someone *was* up here recently," said Vert. "It's a start, anyway. Let's see if there are any other clues around..." With that the three split up and carefully scoured the rooftop for evidence... Vert took the left side, Eddie Green took the right, while Rei checked behind the raised part that the door opened out of...

"Hey, I found something!" the lawyer exclaimed as she bent down and picked an object up... it appeared to be a small wire brush of some sort. Though, it seemed to make Rei's nose wrinkle...

"What did you find, Rei?" asked Vert as she and Eddie ran up.

"Looks like a wire brush," observed the detective.

"Yes, but it smells kinda funny. Any ideas, Detective?" Rei handed the brush to him.

"Hmmmm..." Green carefully sniffed the brush himself. "If I had to hazard a guess... it almost smells like gunpowder."

"Gunpowder?" Vert blinked in confusion. "But why would a wire brush have gunpowder on it?"

Rei then snapped her fingers as an idea came to her. "M-maybe... the sniper used th-this brush t-to clean his g-gun after he s-shot the victim..."

"Well, holy smokes," muttered Detective Green. "So it seems there might have been a sniper after all... But why would they go to all this trouble to snipe someone like Klept O. Maniac?"

"W-well, m-maybe the thief s-stole something important t-to the sniper..." Rei theorized. "And he or she's g-got a b-bad temper..."

Vert closed her eyes as she considered this. "It still sounds like a flimsy motive... and this wire brush is only circumstantial evidence, at best..."

"Well, how 'bout I take this down to Forensics and have them test it, to make sure this really is gunpowder?" Green offered.

"OK, sure," Rei nodded, handing it over, the detective placing the business end of the brush in an evidence bag.

*Wire Brush added to the Court Record.*

"Alright, I'll go and have this processed ASAP," Green stated.

"Very good," nodded Vert. "We'll catch up with you later, Detective." The man nodded and left. After he was gone, Vert pulled out her mobile device and started composing a text message.

"W-what are y-you doing?" Rei asked curiously.

"Sending someone to shadow him," Vert replied. "He looked like he had something on his mind... almost like he wanted to tell us something..."

"W-well, maybe h-he just h-has a l-lot on h-his p-plate right n-now..." Rei postulated.

"Perhaps, but just in case..." Vert finished typing her message, clicking SEND before putting her device away. She was then engulfed in a pillar of light as she transformed into HDD. "Come along, now. It's time we went to check on Peashy..."

"O-Okay..." Rei steeled her self as she stood in front of Green Heart, the CPU wrapping her arms firmly around Rei's torso, before rising into the sky and flying off...

 _August 16_

 _Apartment Complex, Third Floor_

 _Peach's Apartment_

This time, when the two knocked at the door, they got a response. "Who is it?" Peach's voice echoed from inside.

"Vert and Rei," the goddess replied.

"...Alright, come on in," Peach said after a moment's hesitation. Vert quietly opened the door, ushering Rei inside, before gently closing it behind herself. Inside, Peach was sitting on the couch, looking absolutely despondent, her 'Sergeant DeRommer' armor in a messy pile nearby. She was now dressed in a white t-shirt with a honeybee's picture on the front, baggy blue jeans, and a slightly-worn pair of gray sneakers.

"H-hello," Rei greeted. "Adrian sent us t-to ch-check up o-on you..." (What is with her breast size?! They're as big as Vert's if not more so!)

"...That's nice of him," Peach muttered.

"You poor thing," sighed Vert, "You look so miserable..."

"Yeah, well, it's not just me," the blonde sighed. "Mom was so proud of me when she learned I joined the army... I sent some of my paycheck to her every week, 'cause she could never seem to hold a job down to save her life... Now I'm discharged, and poor Mommy's gonna have to go into a homeless shelter or something..." Tears started rolling down her cheeks again...

Vert felt her heart twist at seeing this. "Oh, dear Peashy, please don't cry..." The Leanbox CPU kneeled down in front of Peach, reaching up to her face to wipe her tears away.

"Why are you callin' me Peashy?" Peach half-heartedly protested. "Only Mom and Adrian call me that, and Adrian had to earn that right..."

"Which reminds me," Rei snapped her fingers, "When Adrian first called Miss Macintosh 'Peashy' in court today, you reacted rather... strangely, Lady Vert..."

"...Ah." Vert stood back to her feet. "Yes, I suppose a little explanation is in order..." She pulled out her mobile device, tapping on a screen for a few moments, before showing it to her fellow blonde. "Does this look familiar to you, Miss Peach?"

"Uh..." Peach blinked a few times to get the tears out of her eyes... which quickly lit up in recognition. "Th... that's me! Back when I was about five years old! ...Wait, how how do you have a picture like this, Lady Vert? I lived in Planeptune back then!"

Vert just closed her eyes and smiled. "Just as I thought..." she moved her finger over the screen to move it to the next picture. "Well, then, what do you make of this picture?"

By this time, Rei had sat down on the couch next to Peach to get a look for herself. "I-isn't th-that you hugging little P-Peashy?"

"But that's impossible!" cried Peach, her eyes shrunk to white circles. "I... I only met you for the first time just yesterday! ...And why is your outfit different?"

"That's simple," Vert stated. "This actually is a picture of you and me... from another dimension!"

"W-what?!" gasped Rei.

"Huh...?" Peach looked completely lost.

The busty goddess heaved a sigh of disappointment. "I guess that *would* be a bit too much for you to process..."

"HOLD IT!" said the lawyer. "Are you saying these two in the picture come from the same dimension that the other me did?!"

"Another excellent deduction, Rei Ryghts," Vert nodded in satisfaction.

"O-other you?!" Peach grabbed her head. "Please, stop... I'm starting to get a headache..."

"...Well, let me put it this way," Vert began. "Imagine that there is an alternate universe, with an alternate Gamindustri... One where many things are similar, but some things are also quite different. One where there exist alternate versions of all four goddesses, and maybe some other people as well."

"Alternate... universe?" Peach blinked a few times. "So... this picture you've got of me and you... is from this alternate universe?"

"Exactly," Vert nodded. "This other me... while she has the exact same face, and a similar personality, she not only dresses different, but she is also a bit more cocky, and... slightly less mature. Of course, the fact that she only recently became a CPU might play into that, somewhat..."

"Became a CPU?" Peach scratched her head. "But Mom told me that you CPUs were born that way..."

"In *this* universe, yes," Vert agreed. "However, in that other universe, you need to acquire a certain item in order to become a CPU. And not everyone is compatible with said item, either. My counterpart was fortunate. After all, if you're not compatible, you instead turn into a disgusting monster! Or so I've heard, anyway."

"Eeeewww," Peach shuddered in disgust.

"But I digress. The reason you're only five years old in that alternate universe," Vert explained, "is because you ended up becoming a CPU yourself, so your aging was halted at that point." She then smiled. "Not that I mind that too much, because you're just so *adorable* as a child... But seeing you all grown up, you're still somewhat cute in a way, too. Probably why Adrian fell for you..."

Peach only chuckled. "I guess that explains it... but about Adrian... Y'know, when I first met him, I'd just clobbered one of his drunk comrades who hit on me, and I figured he was just the same. But not only was he sober, he put me flat on my back. That had *never* happened to me before. I got mad, and rushed him again and again... but it always ended the same, with me on the ground and him standing over me." She chuckled again. "I honestly started crying at that point, yelling stuff like 'why can't I punch your lights out like the others?!' And he just calmly stated that my fighting style was like a thug's- my swing was too wide, and I left myself way too open. Then he made a strange offer..."

("Excuse me, ma'am, but would you like to learn how to beat me?")

("W...what?")

("I promise I'm not joking. I can tell you have potential...")

("...dang straight I wanna learn how to beat you!")

"So that's really how it started... Adrian was more of a combat instructor for me, at first. The romance stuff came later," Peach explained. "Of course, the fact that he was always a perfect gentleman to me, compared to most adult men I'd met, might've had something to do with it..."

"Wow..." Rei sighed. "You got lucky, finding such a good man for yourself..." (I'm kind of jealous, actually...)

"Indeed," Vert nodded, "which is why I promise Rei and I will do all in our power to clear him of this wrongful accusation."

"So... you're gonna try finding that sniper?" Peach asked.

"O-of course we will!" Rei affirmed. "Oh, before I forget... here's your trinket back..."

*Peach's Trinket returned to its proper owner.*

"Thanks, Rei... still can't believe I dropped this so easily..." Peach muttered, before suddenly spotting a flash of orange behind the couch's arm. "BEHIND YOU REI-!"

"AAIIEEEEE!" Rei screamed as she literally jumped into Vert's arms, the goddess wobbling dangerously off-balance from the sudden weight. Meanwhile, Peach had lunged forward, managing to grab the intruder by the shirt, before lifting her off the ground...

"Who are you and what are you doing in my apartment?!" Peach growled at the woman, who had short orange hair and matching eyes with musical notes for pupils, along with a bust larger than even Vert's.

"Aaauggh! Sorry, sorry, sorry! I wasn't trying to scare anyone, I swear!" the redhead squeaked in fear.

"Oh, for... Peach, put her down, please," Vert ordered, having somehow managed to recover her balance. "And Rei, you are heavier than you look..."

"S-sorry!" grunted the lawyer as Vert set her back on her feet. Rei then marched over to the orange-haired intruder. "You ever hear of *knocking*, maggot?!" (And seriously, is Leanbox the land of busty girls or something?!)

"I have to agree, MarvelousAQL," Vert sighed, "You really should have knocked..."

"I-it goes against my ninja training!" the busty redhead protested, taking a step back. "I really didn't mean to scare anyone here!"

"Well you failed, miserably!" growled Peach as she cracked her knuckles. "You do that again, and I'll uppercut you to the stars, got it?!"

"OK, OK..." Marvy agreed, waving her arms in fear.

The Leanbox CPU then cleared her throat loudly. "Well, then, now that that's settled... what do you have to report?"

"Huh? ...Oh right!" MarvelousAQL exclaimed. "Yeah, I followed that detective like you asked, and sure enough, there's something related to the case you're investigating!"

"There is?!" gasped Rei.

"Yep! Turns out, some guy at the airport got arrested for having a sniper rifle in his possession!" The redhead reported. "They kept it quiet, 'cause they didn't wanna cause a panic, especially after that thief got killed by a petty officer..."

"OBJECTION!" yelled Peach. "Adrian didn't kill anyone! It was the sniper that killed the thief! Rei Ryghts proved that in court today!"

"Peashy, please, calm yourself," Vert gently instructed. "Anything else, Marvy?"

"Well, just as I was leaving to make my report to you, Lady Vert, I saw some military guy from JAG show up," the ninja answered. "I wonder if the prosecutor for that petty officer's case caught wind of this, too..."

"I-if that the c-case, w-we should g-get there r-right away!" Rei exclaimed urgently.

"Yes, you're right," Vert nodded. "Thank you, Marvy. I'll call you again if I require your services. I'm sorry Peashy, but we have to go..."

"Yeah, go, go!" Peach waved them off. "Do whatever you can to get Adrian off the hook! Hurry!"

Vert and Rei nodded before running out of the apartment. Marvy then saluted, saying, "Well, guess my cameo role in this story is done! Sayonara!" With that, she vanished in a puff of ninja smoke...

 _August 16_

 _Police Department_

 _Main Entrance_

Unfortunately, by the time Rei and Green Heart touched down, they were too late. Leanbox Army personnel were already swarming the area, and the two could make out a short man with bushy, black hair being shoved into an armored car.

"I didn't do anything! I swear, that rifle ain't mine!" he vainly protested as he was shoved into the vehicle, which quickly sped off.

"Alright, soldiers!" Colonel Cutter's voice was plain as day. "Let's get this evidence hauled over to JAG!" Green Heart and Rei saw a group of soldiers carrying a black suitcase wrapped in plastic, along with a few other things, Cutter directing the traffic.

"HOLD IT! Just a minute!" declared Green Heart. "What's the meaning of this?!"

Cutter turned at hearing the voice of his goddess, promptly saluting. "Lady Green Heart! Just following proper JAG procedure for obtaining any relevant evidence and witnesses, ma'am!"

"So do *we* get a chance to look at any of it?!" questioned Rei with a slightly accusatory tone.

"You'll get yer chance, civilian... at trial tomorrow!" Cutter shot back. "Now, if you'll excuse me, Lady Green Heart, I gotta make sure Mr. Schnider's transfer to the brig at base goes smoothly!" He saluted again, before turning and walking off. "Alright, troops, we've got what we came here for! Let's move out!" With that, he climbed into a Jeep driven by a younger officer, which promptly sped off, several other military vehicles following in its wake.

(Talk about being left in the dust...) thought Rei to herself, as Green Heart's transformation reverted and Detective Eddie Green walked up, an extremely guilty look on his face.

"I'm so sorry, Lady Vert, Ms. Rights... I wanted to say something, but I was afraid of my superiors chewing me out..." He scratched the back of his head in shame. "This was my first real homicide case, and I didn't want to screw up... But it looks like I messed up worse by not saying anything..."

"Is there *any* evidence that Colonel Cutter didn't make off with?" Rei asked pointedly.

Eddie bit his lip. "Well, we've got copies of the fingerprints we managed to lift from the suitcase... dunno if that'll help, though..."

"Perhaps you could also give us an overview of this incident?" asked Vert.

"Yeah, sure..." Green nodded. "Come on in, I'll get you some coffee..."

 _August 16_

 _Police Department_

 _Criminal Affairs_

A few minutes later, Detective Green, Vert and Rei were seated at a table in the interrogation room, Vert sipping at some coffee (and trying not to grimace), while Rei had a water bottle in hand. "For your fellow officers' sake, I hope this was just a bad batch of coffee..."

"Actually, it's one of the better ones," Eddie shrugged in apology. "So, anyway, about this incident... That guy you probably saw getting dragged off is a businessman by the name of Henry Schneider, from southeast Leanbox... He was here on a business trip, and he stated that his suitcase should have contained his clothes, not a sniper rifle..."

"Do you think he perhaps picked up the wrong suitcase by accident?" Vert postulated.

"Well, he said he's certain he got the right suitcase off the conveyor..." Green began, "But he left it unattended when he had to go sit on the toilet. Airline food apparently didn't agree with him..."

"T-too much i-information," Rei groaned.

The detective winced. "A-anyway, when he came back out, he admitted something didn't look right about the suitcase, but he didn't think much of it, until the metal detectors at the main entrance went off... The guards detained him, opened the suitcase, and the rest is history."

"I see..." Vert nodded in understanding.

"W-well, n-not to c-change the subject or a-anything, b-but did C-Colonel Cutter snatch the w-wire brush as well?" Rei inquired.

"No, he didn't," Green affirmed. "It technically wasn't relevant to the incident with Mr. Schneider, so..." He then snapped his fingers. "Actually, Forensics should be done testing that by now... how about we go down there together?"

"Very well then," said Vert as she stood up, Rei following suit. "Lead the way, detective..."

 _August 16_

 _Police Department_

 _Forensics Lab_

Rei had seen forensic laboratories before, both on TV and in Lowee, and this one didn't seem much different, other than having a few more windows- but that was likely due to the warmer climate in Leanbox.

Detective Green led the lawyer and the CPU over to one of the scientists- a black-shadowed NPC, though his body shape showed he was wearing a lab coat, at least. "Hey, did you finish analyzing that wire brush like I asked?"

The NPC nodded. "Yes, and it was gunpowder, just as you expected." He then turned to Green's companions. "And greetings to you, Lady Vert, and..." He trailed off at seeing Rei.

"I c-come in p-peace!" the lawyer insisted as she raised her hands in a defensive gesture.

"Well, I should *hope* so, given that Lady Vert herself is escorting you," the scientist nodded.

*Wire Brush updated in Court Record.* "Is there anything else, Detective Green?"

"Actually, yeah, I was hoping we could check the fingerprint evidence from Henry Schneider's case..." Eddie affirmed.

"We think it might be related to our case," Vert added.

"OK, right this way," the NPC beckoned as he walked over to a computer monitor. Typing at the keyboard for a few seconds, he pulled up the fingerprint data. "We found two sets of prints on the suitcase, none on the rifle itself, though... One set belongs to Mr. Schneider, of course, but we haven't been able to identify the other set..."

"W-were th-they too s-smudged?" Rei asked.

"No, we just didn't find a match in the criminal database," the scientist clarified. "Just so we're clear, Mr. Schneider's prints were found only on the handle of the suitcase, while the others were found on the buckles..."

"Which would imply that Mr. Schnieder never opened the suitcase before he was caught with it," Vert deduced.

Rei then spoke up, "D-did you t-try entering th-those other prints into the m-military database?"

The NPC seemed somewhat nonplussed by this. "Well, no... why would I do that?"

"Because the defendant in our case is a petty officer in the Leanbox Army," stated Vert.

"Oh, I see..." the shadow-man nodded. "Well, I guess I could do that, then..." He typed on the keyboard again, bringing up the army's fingerprint database, before running the unidentified prints... "This might take a while, just so you know..."

"I'm sure you'll get a result soon, after all, why drag this story along for no reason?" the busty blonde goddess pointed out.

"Me thinks you've been hanging around Neptune and Nepgear too much..." Rei groaned as she face-palmed. But, sure enough, the words 'MATCH FOUND' popped on the screen not long after...

"Well, what do you know... Good call, Lady Vert," the NPC muttered as he brought up the results. "And the winner is... retired Gunnery Sergeant... Steven Hauser."

"WHAT?!" Vert and Rei gasped in shock.

"Steve Hauser? Wait, wasn't that the real estate guy we met yesterday?" Eddie Green said confusedly.

"Yes, we met him at the crime scene!" exclaimed Vert. "And he was carrying a black suitcase as well!"

"Well, how about that... Guess you've found your sniper," said the NPC as he checked Hauser's military record. "Yep, it says right here, he functioned as a sniper during his time in the army..."

"B-but that means... it was him! *He* must have been the one that shot and killed his brother!" stated Rei.

"Should I go and have him arrested?" Detective Green offered.

Vert thought about it for a moment. "Actually, no, let's not."

"Huh...?" Rei blinked in confusion. "Why not?"

"Well, the evidence we have is only circumstantial, at best," the CPU explained. "After all, Mr. Hauser's prints are only on the suitcase, not the rifle itself... It might be better to wait until tomorrow, and hit Colonel Cutter with this evidence at trial..."

Rei then snapped her fingers in comprehension. "Which means we'll end up catching Steve Hauser off-guard, and we might be able to elicit a confession out of him! And get Adrian off the hook at the same time! That's brilliant, Lady Vert!"

"Well then I suppose I'll get the fingerprint data printed off for you..." muttered the shadow-scientist as he did just that...

*Fingerprint Data added to the Court Record.*

"Thank you very much," Vert acknowledged graciously. "Well then Rei, I suppose it is time for us to retire to the Basilicom for the night..."

"O-okay," Rei nodded, before bowing to Detective Green. "Th-thank you for a-all your help, Detective."

"Good luck in court tomorrow!" Eddie said as the two ladies took their leave...

(Steve Hauser... I should have suspected him from the beginning,) the lawyer thought to herself. (After all, in a murder investigation, it's usually family you check out first. And I'm sure Steve had more than enough motive to kill his brother, a notorious thief... Just you wait, maggot! I look forward to destroying you utterly in court tomorrow!)

To be continued...


	5. Trial, Day 2 (Part 1)

Well, since I've been taking so long with this chapter, I decided to split it up to prevent any further drought... I'll do my best to get cracking on the next part, though Christmas will likely take priority...

Author Heart - Ance- Well, Colonel Cutter is like any other 'undefeated prosecutor' in the Ace Attorney series- do whatever it takes to get the accused declared guilty. But we all know what happens to their kind in the end... :P

DaToskin- Yeah, Rei's not doing any transforming this time around. Maybe I'll keep that idea in mind for a future story, though...

Gigarot- That pun was actually completely unintentional. XD But yeah, good catch.

Drean- Yeah, motive might be a sticky point for Rei in this case...

And now, on with the show!

Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney

The Dead Thief's Turnabout

By Derald Snyder

Trial- Day 2 (Part 1)

Court Record:

-Autopsy Report

-Woman's Footprints

-Crime Scene Diagram

-.30-Caliber Assault Rifle

-.338-Caliber Bullet

-Size-15 Footprint

-Wire Brush

-Fingerprint Data

 _August 18, 9:08 AM_

 _Leanbox Army Base_

 _Defendant Lobby No. 1_

"Good morning, Lady Vert, Ms. Ryghts," Adrian greeted politely as he was led into the lobby, before his handcuffs were unlocked.

"Good morning," Rei nodded.

"*Yaaaaaaawwwn* Good morning," said Vert as she politely covered her mouth.

"Not used to getting up this early, m'lady?" the soldier asked with a smirk.

Rei just rolled her eyes. "That's an understatement... I had to use an airhorn to wake her up!"

"And my ears are still ringing..." Vert moaned as she rubbed her temples. The doors then opened, revealing Peach, today dressed in a yellow-and-black hoodie, reminiscent of her Ultradimension counterpart...

"Good morning!" she said in a slightly up-beat voice. "So, do you know who set up poor Adrian?"

"M-more along the l-lines of 'Adrian w-was in th-the wrong p-place at the w-wrong time,'" Rei stuttered. "B-but yes, I'm sure of w-who did it... I j-just have to p-prove it..." She then cleared her throat. "S-sorry... pre-trial jitters, I'm afraid..."

"Yeah, Colonel Cutter nearly owned you yesterday," Adrian muttered. "Hopefully you're better prepared this time..."

"Well, it's not like... *yawn*... like we're jumping in blind, like we were yesterday," Vert pointed out.

Peach nodded grimly. "OK... well, I'll be watching from the audience, so good luck!" With that, she walked out.

Rei nodded to herself. "OK, l-let's put an end t-to this once and f-for all..."

 _August 18, 9:30 AM_

 _Leanbox Army Base_

 _Courtroom No. 1_

"Ten-hut!" declared General Jeffrey Lawson as he banged his gavel. "This court-martial of Petty Officer Adrian Harold Johns is now in session!"

"Locked and loaded, sir!" Colonel Cutter saluted.

"The defense is ready, General," said Rei.

"Zzzzz..." Vert snored.

The horned lawyer heaved a sigh. "My assistant, on the other hand... just a minute, sir." Taking out an airhorn, she pressed the button, filling the courtroom with a 100-decibel blast.

"AAAAAHHH!" screamed Vert. "I'm awake, I'm awake!"

"Please stay that way, Lady Vert," Rei sighed as she put the airhorn away.

"Y'know, a little warning woulda been nice, civilian..." grunted Cutter with a pinky finger in his ear. "Not that I disagree with your methods, though."

"W-well then," General Lawson shook his head to dissipate the ringing, "Now that everyone's awake and alert, let us proceed. Colonel, your opening statement, if you would."

"Yessir, General!" Cutter saluted, before beginning, "So yesterday, Ms. Ryghts here came up with the theory that Klept O. Maniac was killed not by the accused, but by a sniper hidin' on the rooftop. So, I had my men haul butt up there to see if that was a possibility..."

"And did they find anything?" Lawson inquired.

"Well, there *was* a footprint up there, left fairly recently, but nothin' that outright suggested a sniper," the colonel explained, before continuing, "But then, I got word of someone who'd been detained at the the airport around the time of the murder... and it turned out, this man had a sniper rifle in his possession!"

"Wh-whaaaaaaaattt?!" cried the general in surprise, causing the gallery to start chattering. He quickly recovered, though, and banged his gavel to quiet the crowd. "Well, this is a surprise! It seems the defense might've been onto something after all."

Cutter shrugged at this. "Much as I hate to admit it, you may just be right, General... Anyway, we went ahead had this suspect transferred to our custody as well as the relevant evidence, which I will present to the court now." He then lifted up a rifle from behind his bench, wrapped in plastic. "This here's the very sniper rifle in question... and it's also a .338-caliber, consistent with the bullet found in the victim's head... unfortunately, we couldn't find any fingerprints on this puppy..."

*Sniper Rifle added to the Court Record.*

"However," Cutter continued, "we *did* find fingerprints on the suitcase the rifle was carried in!" He then lifted up the suitcase in question, enclosed in a large evidence bag. "The suspect's prints were found on the handle as expected... there was another set of prints, though, that we haven't been able to identify yet..."

*Black Suitcase added to the Court Record.*

"Should we tell the general about the fingerprint match we found?" Vert whispered to Rei.

"Not yet," Rei whispered back. "I want to see what Cutter has up his sleeve first..." The CPU silently nodded at this.

"And what about the suspect himself?" asked Lawson.

"Well, we tried to interrogate him, but seeing as he's a legal Leanbox citizen, we couldn't be *too* rough on 'im..." said Cutter. "Anyway, he just keeps denyin' he knows anything, so I figured I'd just drag his sorry arse into court to make 'im explain himself!" He then banged his fist on the bench. "Bailiff! Have the suspect marched down to the witness stand!"

"Yessir, Colonel!" the bailiff saluted. A few minutes later, the man in question was escorted in... He was somewhat short, but not to the point he would have to stand on a box to testify... Short, bushy black hair surrounded a tanned face with brown eyes that were wide with panic, as he looked from side to side...

"O-oh man... first I get arrested, then I get dragged off by the army, now I'm being tried in military court? Oh Goddess, what have I done to deserve this?"

"Name and occupation, civilian," Colonel Cutter ordered.

"B-but I didn't do anything, man! I never owned a rifle in my life, I swear!" the man protested.

"Witness, repeated denials will only hurt your case," Lawson shook his head.

"But I didn't do anything! This is all just a big mistake! I've been framed! ...or something! Please, I've got a wife and kids back home!"

(Seems he's in too much a panic to even listen to anybody,) Rei sighed inwardly.

Vert then slapped her gloved hand on the bench. "Mr... Schneider, was it? That will be quite enough."

"Huh?" the man looked over at the defense's bench. "L-Lady Vert?! W-what the heck are YOU doin' here?!"

"I am assisting the defense in this case, in order to find out the truth of what happened," The CPU responded. "Now, first of all, you've been called here as a witness, not the accused. All we want is your side of the story, kind sir. And if you are indeed innocent, then you will have nothing to fear, as my lawyer is quite relentless in her pursuit of the truth..."

(Wait a minute, since when was I *your* lawyer, Vert?!) Rei thought as she sweat-dropped.

"I have... nothing to fear...?" The tension seemed to visibly drain from the man's face as he finally managed a small smile. "Y... yeah... Yeah! If Lady Vert's got my back, then I've got nothin' to worry about!"

"Thank you, Lady Vert," General Lawson sighed in relief. "Now then, witness, your name and occupation, please."

"Right... OK." The man took a deep breath. "OK... my name is Henry Schneider, and I'm a businessman from southeast Leanbox. I was supposed to be on a business trip, before the crud hit the fan... I mean, things just happened so fast, y'know?"

The general/judge nodded. "Well then, Mr. Schnieder, if you could give us your testimony about the events that led up to your arrest..."

"Y-yessir," Henry assented. "Well, I got off my plane like normal, then I went to the conveyor belt and grabbed my suitcase. But on the way out, I was suddenly hit with a sudden urge to use the toilet! So I left my suitcase outside while I rushed in and... did my duty, so to speak. When I came back out, I thought something looked odd about my suitcase, but I figured I was just tired from the flight and bathroom break... But then, as I was walking out, metal detector started beepin' like crazy! I had no idea what was going on! Then they opened the suitcase, and I was just as shocked as everyone else to see that sniper rifle in there! It was supposed to be my clothes in there! But the guards didn't believe me and dragged me off, and... well, you know the rest, right?"

Lawson closed his eyes as he pondered the testimony. "So, the witness is asserting that his spare clothes were supposed to be in his suitcase, not the rifle?"

"That's the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, Your Honor!" Schneider asserted. "And now, I've got nothin' but the clothes on my back! Just my luck..."

"Hmph. Sounds plausible enough," muttered Cutter, "but let's see if your story stands up to scrutiny!"

"Indeed. The defense will now cross the witness."

"Yes, sir," Rei nodded. "First of all, Mr. Schneider... what time did you get off the plane, exactly?"

"Uhh, about noon I think?" Henry tapped his fingers together.

"Can you be more specific?" Rei pressed.

"No need, civilian!" Cutter cut in, waving a small stack of papers in his hand. "I've got the whole flight manifest for the day of the incident right here! Read it and weep!"

"Very well, the court accepts the flight manifest into evidence," stated Lawson.

*Flight Manifest added to the Court Record.*

"May I see that?" Rei asked politely. The manifest was promptly passed to the bailiff, who walked over and handed it to Rei. "Thank you." Adjusting her eyeglasses, she began skimming over the list... "Mr. Schnieder, what flight were you on?"

"Um, #33, I think..."

"OK, then... let me see..." the lawyer muttered as she turned the pages until she found the number. "Ah-ha, here we are, Flight #33... Arrived at... 12:35 PM!"

"Yeah," Henry nodded, "that sounds about right..."

"But then, we have a problem," Rei continued, "because this contradicts with the autopsy report!"

"It does?" said General Lawson.

"That's right, sir," Rei nodded, holding up the report in question. "Because, according to this, the victim died at about 12:25 PM... about ten minutes earlier! In other words..." She slammed her fists on the bench. "By the time Mr. Schneider's plane touched down, Klept O. Maniac was already long dead!"

"Good Heavens! You're right, Ryghts!" the judge/general gasped in shock, causing the crowd to begin murmuring.

"Which also means, that Henry Schneider could *not* have been the sniper that fired the fatal shot!" Rei asserted.

"Yes! Thank you! Oh, thank you, Ms. Ryghts...!" Henry gasped as he nearly collapsed with relief.

"Heh heh heh..." Colonel Cutter suddenly chuckled. "Not bad, civilian. It seems you can at least put two and two together... even when it puts you in a corner."

"How so, Colonel?" Rei challenged.

"Yes, what do you mean?" asked Vert.

"Ain't it obvious? You've eliminated the only viable suspect you had other than the accused!" Cutter pointed out. "After all, Mr. Schneider was the only one on the scene with a sniper rifle in his possession!"

"But it ain't mine, man!" Henry protested again.

"Mr. Schneider, please," the Leanbox CPU admonished.

"It's okay, Mr. Schnieder, I believe you," Rei added. "And Colonel Cutter... nice try."

"Whaddaya mean, 'nice try'?" the colonel/prosecutor growled.

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me," Rei said with a sinister smirk. "Unfortunately for you, I don't get fooled twice. You tried to make me prove your case for you once again... But see, I never suspected this witness to begin with. I has another suspect in mind all along, fool!"

"You did? But who?" inquired General Lawson.

"Allow me to present the evidence that implicates this suspect, General! TAKE THAT!" Rei presented the fingerprint data to the bailiff, who handed it to the JAG officer.

"Hmm... this looks like a fingerprint analysis," Lawson observed.

"Correct, sir," Rei nodded. "Colonel Cutter may not have been able to identify the second set of prints on the suitcase containing the sniper rifle... but we did!"

"Wh-what?!" Cutter gasped, sweat starting to bead on his face. "You did? But how?!"

"We had them compared against the Leanbox military database, on a hunch," Vert explained. "After all, it only makes sense that a trained sniper would have served in the Leanbox Army..."

"Indeed," muttered Lawson. "It appears the prints in question belong to one retired Gunnery Sergeant Steve Hauser, according to this analysis..." He closed his eyes, deep in thought. "I could swear I've heard that name somewhere before..."

"Of course you have, mag- um, sir," Rei caught herself. "*Ahem* You see, this gunnery sergeant happens to be the older brother of Mr. Rickard T. Hauser... AKA Klept O. Maniac, the victim!"

"Wh-whaaaaat?!" gasped the general.

"GAAAHHH!" screamed Cutter as he recoiled from an imaginary gunshot. "The victim's b-brother?! It can't be...!" The crowd started chattering excitedly.

"Oh yes it can be, maggot!" Rei declared as she pushed her glasses back up her nose. "Because Lady Vert and I met Mr. Hauser on the day of the crime, when we were investigating the alley where the victim met his end!"

"Indeed we did," Vert nodded in agreement. "And Detective Eddie Green can back us up on that. Although, we initially thought he was there to pray for his brother's departed soul..."

"Yes, that sounds reasonable enough..." General Lawson nodded.

"However, that was *not* the case!" Rei declared, pointing her index finger. "In fact, we ended catching him just as he was departing the scene of the crime... the crime that he committed! That is, sniping his brother Rickard to death!"

"OBJECTION!" Colonel Cutter banged his fist on the bench. "Now wait just one cotton-pickin' minute! Why the heck would this former gunny decide to go off and kill his own flesh and blood for? Even if he *was* a thief, that don't justify killing him!"

"Ummm..." Rei faltered.

"Hmmm..." Vert pondered for a moment, before something came to her. "Oh, wait! I remember something Mr. Hauser told me, while we were discussing his brother..."

("...to call him the 'black sheep' of the family would be an understatement. Believe me when I say my family did everything they could to try and help him... to no avail.")

"It could be... he thought his brother was beyond help," the CPU postulated.

Cutter growled, "So what, he just decided to off him like a rabid dog? Put him out of his misery?"

"R-regardless, h-his prints are th-the second set on th-the suitcase c-containing the s-sniper rifle!" Rei stuttered slightly. "A-at the very least, w-we need t-to bring him in f-for questioning!"

"I agree," said Lawson. "Colonel, could you go and fetch Sergeant Hauser for us?"

"Sir, yes sir!" Cutter saluted. "I only need half an hour to drag that gunny's rear end in here! Not a minute more!" Turning back to Rei, he said, "This fight's just begun, civilian! You still have to prove this guy was the one that pulled the trigger, after all. This battle can still go either way!" With that, he retreated in a crouching sprint like yesterday.

"Very good," the general nodded. "In the meantime, we'll adjourn for a short recess. I expect everyone to be back here by 1037 hours sharp!" He then banged his gavel. "But for now... Dismissed!"

To be continued...


	6. Trial, Day 2 (Part 2)

Figures... I get some unexpected alone time, and manage to bang out the rest of this chapter in record time... Well, only two epilogue chapters after this, so enjoy!

Drean- Well, I'm sure we'll find out about the motive soon enough...

Guest- Bzzzzzt! WRONG! *cue Price is Right losing horns*

DaToskin- Rei's smart enough to not get fooled twice, but she can't let her guard down yet... and what did you mean by 'pulling a Nep?'

mr I hate znt nobles kill em- Yeah, sorry about killing your character, but he seemed to work better as a victim to me... But look on the bright side! If not for your idea, this story would never have existed in the first place! :)

Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney

The Dead Thief's Turnabout

By Derald Snyder

Trial- Day 2 (Part 1)

Court Record:

-Autopsy Report

-Woman's Footprints

-Crime Scene Diagram

-.30-Caliber Assault Rifle

-.338-Caliber Bullet

-Size-15 Footprint

-Wire Brush

-Fingerprint Data

-Black Suitcase

-Sniper Rifle

-August 16 Flight Manifest

 _August 18, 10:37 AM_

 _Leanbox Army Base_

 _Courtroom No. 1_

General Lawson banged his gavel. "Atten-shun! This court martial is now back in session." The crowd promptly quieted... save Vert, who was once again snoring away.

"Again, Lady Vert?!" Rei groaned in exasperation.

"I must concur with the defense here..." sighed the judge/general.

"Cripes, don't tell me you're gonna have to break out the airhorn again..." Cutter grumbled.

As soon as he said that, however, the CPU's eyes shot open. "No! Not the airhorn again! I'm awake, I'm awake, I'm awake!"

"For once I have to thank you, Colonel," said Rei. "Now I don't have to burst everyone's eardrums again..."

"Indeed," Lawson nodded. "Now then, Colonel Cutter, were you able to retrieve Mr. Hauser?"

"Of course!" scoffed the JAG prosecutor. "Whether it be in the courtroom or out in the field, Colonel Cutter always gets his man!" He then banged his fist on his bench. "Alright, gunny, get on up here!" The man in question promptly took his place at the witness stand, wearing a business suit similar to when Rei and Vert had first met him, carrying a black briefcase in one hand. "Name, rank, and current occupation! You know the drill!"

"Yes sir, Colonel!" The man saluted. "Retired Gunnery Sergeant Steve Hauser, reporting for duty! Oh, and I work as a real estate agent nowadays..."

"Sergeant Hauser. Do you understand why you have been summoned here?" Lawson inquired.

Steve Hauser stated, "Well, I would assume it's due to the fact that I'm the older brother of the victim in this case..."

"Actually, Mr. Hauser, it's because your fingerprints were discovered on a piece of evidence directly related to the incident," Rei pointed out.

"Is that right?" Hauser muttered. "Well, I *was* hanging around the crime scene not long after the incident occurred, as you well know... Is it really that surprising my fingerprints were discovered at the scene?"

"Well then, would you testify as to your actions on the day in question?" General Lawson requested.

"Yes sir! Willco, General!" Hauser saluted again, before beginning his testimony. "I was on my way to the airport to get on a flight for a business trip. But after I got out of my car, I heard some commotion. Curious, I asked a passerby about what happened. Imagine my shock when I heard that my brother had met his end! I was so distraught... everything went fuzzy... I must have been in a daze for a while. I didn't really snap out of it until Lady Vert and the others met me... by that time, I knew I had missed my flight. Boy, did I get chewed out by my boss for that... but it's not like I could tell him that Klept O. Maniac was my brother, either."

"I see," General Lawson nodded. "So you were in shock from hearing about your brother's death..."

"Yes sir," Steve nodded. "Like I said, I might have gotten my fingerprints on a piece of evidence without even realizing it..."

"...Ms. Ryghts, your cross-examination, please."

"It would seem even the good general realizes just how vague Hauser's testimony is," Vert muttered.

(Which means I'm going to have to press him for more details before I can start pulling his story apart,) Rei mused. "Well, first of all, Mr. Hauser, I have to ask... do you remember exactly where you wandered while you were in a daze?

Hauser bit his lip. "Well, I can't be sure, but I think I was mostly around the crime scene itself..."

"Well, did ya happen to enter the airport itself at any point?" Colonel Cutter asked.

The former sergeant blinked in confusion for a moment. "Oh...? Oh! Well, now that you mention it, I think I might have wandered in there at some point..."

(Argh! Way to undercut me, Cutter!) Rei fumed inwardly. (You certainly live up to your name...)

"Do you remember anything you did while at the airport?" Vert pressed. "Perhaps, did you use the restroom at any point?"

"Th-the restroom?" Steve closed his eyes in thought, before shaking his head. "No, I don't think so..."

Catching on to what Vert was doing, Rei slammed her fists on the bench. "Then explain how *your* suitcase ended up in the possession of one Henry Schneider, who was busy with a bathroom break after the crime occurred!"

"W-what?" Hauser grunted in mild surprise. "What are you talking about?"

"Allow me to enlighten you," said Vert. "Henry Schneider was arrested for illegal weapons possession not long after Mr. Rickard Hauser's murder. However, his fingerprints were only found on the handle of the suitcase containing the weapon..." She then slapped her gloved hand on the bench. "But *your* fingerprints were found on the buckles, indicating you had actually opened this suitcase, and thus knew its contents!"

"Wait, WHAT?!" Hauser cried out, before something occurred to him, causing him to slap his forehead. "Aww, sssshhhhooot!" he barely avoided cursing in the CPU's presence. "I never even bothered to open my suitcase when I got back home! So mine got switched with this Henry guy's...?! Dang it!"

"So you *do* know the contents of the suitcase, and why Mr. Schneider was arrested!" accused Rei, pointing her index finger at the witness.

"Ugggh, I'm sorry!" Hauser groaned. "Yes, I know my suitcase was supposed to have a sniper rifle inside... But I've got an explanation for that, all right? Just hear me out! Please, Lady Vert!"

"Order!" Lawson banged his gavel. "Sergeant, calm yourself! You know panicking gets you killed on the field!"

"So if you've got an explanation, just give it to us straight!" said Colonel Cutter. "Don't let the former psycho over there knock you off your game, soldier..."

Steve Hauser took a few deep breaths. "Y-yes sir... sorry. I think I'm OK now..."

"Very good," the general nodded. "Now, give us your explanation as to why you had that sniper rifle in your possession at the time of the incident..."

"Sir!" Hauser saluted. "As you likely know, I was once a trained sniper during my service in the army! That rifle I had was a relic of sorts from my last tour of duty, so to speak. My boss wanted to impress on the associates I was meeting that I was a straight shooter, and what better way to symbolize that than to refer to my stellar sniping career? After all, I never missed a single target while on duty!"

"I see," General Lawson. "So it meant to be used as a prop, nothing more..."

"That's right, sir!" Steve nodded. "After all, it wasn't even loaded!"

"OBJECTION!" Rei suddenly cut in. "The evidence contradicts your statement! After all, this sniper rifle shows signs of having been recently fired! How could it do that when it wasn't loaded, maggot?!"

"Gurk!" Hauser gripped his briefcase with both hands, sweating.

"Gunnery Sergeant... you've been lying to this court!" declared Vert with a hint of anger. "And in front of your own goddess, no less! What did I tell you about that?!"

"AUUGGHH!" Steve Hauser cowered behind his suitcase. "Forgive meeee!" The gallery started chattering confusedly.

"You go, Rei!" Peach cried from the crowd. "Nail that bastard!"

"Order! Order!" yelled Lawson as he banged his gavel repeatedly. "And Staff Sergeant Macintosh, you're out of order! Sit down and shut up!" Peashy squeaked and promptly did as ordered. "As for you, Gunny! What is the meaning of this?!"

"Nnngggghhh..." Hauser groaned. "A-all right, all right, I admit it! I was lying about being in a daze!"

"You idiot!" yelled Colonel Cutter, banging his fist on the bench. "Lyin' under oath's a serious crime, y'know!"

"Very serious," Vert agreed. "An innocent man could be wrongly convicted because of your actions, Mr. Hauser. I highly suggest you come clean now, and save yourself further disgrace."

The former sergeant bowed his head in apparent shame. "...Yes, Lady Vert. I understand. The truth is..." He took a deep breath. "I was angry, when I heard about what happened. My own flesh and blood, killed by a fellow soldier, over something as petty as theft, or so I thought at the time. So I went into a blind alley, and fired my rifle into a dumpster, to muffle the sound. There really wasn't any other way for me to express my rage..."

Lawson shook his head in disappointment. "Why did you not testify truthfully from the beginning, Sergeant?"

"Because, I know what angle the defense would argue if I did." Steve looked over at Rei Ryghts. "You want to try to pin this crime on me, just because I happened to be a sniper at one point, don't you?"

"Only if that's the truth of what happened," Rei said firmly.

"I'm strongly tempted to quote my favorite movie here, but that'd be too cliché, so I won't. That being said..." Hauser reached into his briefcase, pulling out a military helmet, which he swiftly donned. "If you want to do battle in the hot zone, you'd better be prepared to be med-evac'ed!" he declared, now holding his briefcase as if it were a machine gun.

"Meep!" Rei squeaked. (OK, didn't see that coming...)

"If Sergeant Hauser is trying to put on a tough act, we must be getting close," Vert whispered. "But I can see the fear in his eyes. Don't let him intimidate you now!"

"So, defense, I challenge you to present proof! Proof that I used my rifle to kill my brother, instead of this petty officer here!" Hauser declared loudly.

"Heh heh heh... and once again, the gauntlet is thrown," Cutter chuckled. "Let's see how you respond this time, civilian!"

The former goddess simply gave her trademark 'psycho smirk' in response. "Well then, Sarge, let's see how you like this bombshell! TAKE THAT!" She presented the wire brush.

"A wire brush?" Lawson muttered in slight confusion. "What does that prove?"

"This wire brush was found on the western rooftop above the crime scene," Rei explained. "We had it tested by the local forensics lab, and it came back positive for gunpowder!"

"Gunpowder?!" gasped the general.

"Yes sir," the horned lawyer nodded. "I can only speculate that it was used by the killer to clean his weapon after firing the fatal shot!"

"OBJECTION!" Cutter cut in. "That wire brush could've been left up there long ago! There's no way you can prove it belonged to the sniper, if there even was one!"

"OBJECTION!" Rei shot back. "And what about the footprint that was also found up there, Colonel? You and I both know that could only have been left recently!"

"OBJECTION!" Cutter banged his fist. "Even if that's true, you still can't connect it to the wire brush! It's circumstantial at best!"

"Oh really?" Rei crossed her arms. "Tell me Sergeant, what size shoe do you wear?"

"Size 15, why?" Hauser responded... before realization dawned. "GAAAHH!" He cowered behind his briefcase again.

"In other words, the exact size of the footprint left in the sand!" Rei declared triumphantly. "And I bet if we compare that footprint to all the pairs of shoes you own, we'll find a match for the tread pattern!"

"Arrrrgh!" cried Steve Hauser as he dove behind the witness stand as if ducking for cover, sending the crowd into a tizzy. "Mayday! Mayday! I'm taking heavy fire!"

"Order! Order! Order in the court!" cried the general/judge as he banged his gavel several times. "Do I have to make you all do pull-ups until the cows come home?!" The gallery promptly calmed down somewhat.

"Now that doesn't seem like the reaction an innocent man would have," Vert pointed out.

"Speak for yourself, Lady Vert!" Cutter countered. "He's just followin' his instincts! Any soldier would do what he did when confronted with an enemy ambush!"

"The question is, can he return fire?" Rei challenged.

"He doesn't have to!" Cutter retorted. "I'm going to provide him cover fire so he can escape!"

"Are you saying you have a rebuttal, Colonel Cutter?" Lawson inquired.

"Yes sir!" The veteran soldier nodded. "The thing is, civilian, while you've been busy trying to tie Sergeant Hauser to the crime scene, you've forgotten one crucial thing!"

"And what's that, Colonel?" Rei asked.

"It hasn't been proven that the gunny's rifle is the murder weapon!" Cutter declared. "After all, I said the .338 caliber bullet was consistent with the rifle in question... but I never said it was a match!"

"W... wait, what?!" Rei gasped, starting to sweat a bit herself.

"Are you saying... the bullet does *not* match the sniper rifle in question?" Lawson said in surprise.

"Exactly!" Cutter declared triumphantly. "The ballistic markings weren't even close! And that's a fact! So how do you respond to that, Rei Ryghts?!"

"AAAAAAHHHH!" Rei recoiled in shock. (It... it can't be...!) The gallery started chattering in confusion...

"We've been suckered again," Vert muttered, looking over at her companion. "Colonel Cutter certainly knows how to hold his trump card until the end, doesn't he?"

"Well, you know what they say, Lady Vert, about how no battle plan survives first contact with the enemy," Cutter chuckled. "Which is why I had a backup plan waitin' in the wings, just in case!"

(What... He *planned* for this?!) Rei thought to herself.

"Heh... thanks, Colonel," said Steve Hauser as he stood back up. "Looks like you saved my hide..."

"Of course, Gunny!" the colonel smirked. "A good soldier never leaves a man behind, after all!"

General Lawson then banged his gavel. "Much as I hate to admit it, it looks like defense's theory holds no water. After all, if the ballistics don't match, then this sniper rifle was nothing but a red herring all along..."

(No no no!) thought Rei in desperation. (Where did I go wrong? I was certain I had him...!)

"D-does this mean I'm s-still guilty, too?" Henry Schneider stuttered.

"No, no," Lawson shook his head. "You're fine, Mr. Schnieder. Sergeant Hauser simply grabbed the wrong suitcase at the airport. You're off the hook."

"My deepest apologies, Mr. Schneider," Hauser bowed. "I'll make sure to get your clothes back to you..."

(Sergeant Hauser made a mistake? No, that can't be right!) Rei pondered. (He must have been trying to get rid of the evidence... but why, if the bullet didn't match anyway?)

"Well then, now that that's settled, I will proceed to my verdict," declared the general. "This court finds the accused, Petty Officer Adrian Harold Johns..."

 _ **"OBJECTION!"**_

Rei slammed her fists on the bench. "J-just a minute, General! I-I'm not d-done yet!"

"Oh, come on..." Cutter groaned. "I've already shot your case full o'holes! Just surrender, will ya?!"

"Ms. Ryghts. I must concur with the colonel," Lawson warned. "Do you honestly think you can make a rebuttal at this point?"

(I... I *can't* give up now!) Rei thought to herself. (Both Adrian and Peashy are counting on me!)

"General Lawson," Vert spoke up. "I request you give my lawyer a minute to gather her thoughts. I still have my doubts about this case, myself..."

"Y-you too, Lady Vert?!" Cutter grunted in dismay.

The general considered for a moment, before heaving a sigh. "Very well, as you wish, Lady Vert. But this is the last chance for the defense. If Ms. Ryghts cannot come up with a convincing argument, then nothing will stay my gavel. Do you understand?"

"U-understood, sir," Rei acknowledged. "J-just g-give me a m-moment..." (I have to go back over this whole case... there must be something I've missed!) She closed her eyes as she went into deep thought...

(OK, let's review the facts. The victim, Klept O. Maniac, AKA Rickard T. Hauser was shot dead in a dark alley after being violently assaulted by Peach. The position of the body indicated he was shot from directly above, meaning either Adrian killed the victim from close range... or a sniper shot the victim from the rooftop. But the bullet did not match Adrian's assault rifle, which means the sniper theory is more likely. So, first question: _How did the sniper sneak his weapon onto the scene?)_

 _(*It was hidden in a suitcase*)_

(The sniper hid his gun in a suitcase he was carrying. And after committing the deed, he waited for the ruckus to die down, before discreetly exiting the crime scene. Which leads to the next question: _How did he dispose of the evidence?)_

 _(*He switched the suitcases*)_

(...right. He swapped the suitcase with one owned by Mr. Henry Schneider, who just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. But that was a bit risky, wasn't it? After all... _what if he had been caught making the swap?)_

 _(*He had a backup plan*)_

(Just like Colonel Cutter, he had a backup plan in case something went wrong. _But how would he have avoided being suspected if he were caught with the sniper rifle?)_

 _(*The bullet didn't match*)_

(...if the ballistics test came back negative, he'd only be charged with weapons possession... a serious crime itself, but not as bad as murder. But if that's the case, _how did he fool the ballistics test?)_

 _(*He altered the gun barrel*)_

(Wait, that's it! If he somehow altered the gun barrel so the ballistics no longer matched, he'd be free and clear! _But what could he have used to alter the barrel?)_

 _(*The wire brush!*)_

 **THE CULPRIT ALTERED THE GUN BARREL WITH THE WIRE BRUSH!**

Rei's eyes shot open. "I'VE GOT IT!"

"Wahh!" cried Vert in shock. "Don't yell like that! My ears are still sensitive!"

"Have you come up with a rebuttal, Ms. Ryghts?" asked General Lawson.

"Yes sir, I have," the lawyer nodded. "I just had to turn my thinking around. You see, the question isn't, 'Why doesn't the bullet match the gun?' Rather, it's 'How was the gun altered to not match the bullet fired from it?'"

"Altered?" blinked Lawson in surprise.

"Are you sayin' the evidence was tampered with?!" Cutter grunted.

"Yes. And I have proof," Rei asserted. "I would direct your attention back to the wire brush presented earlier. At first, I thought it had been used by the sniper to clean his weapon after firing it... But that doesn't make any sense. After all, why clean your gun if you were going to dispose of it afterward, anyway? Not to mention... General, in your experience, would you use an instrument like this to clean your gun?"

"Absolutely not!" General Lawson answered. "Using a tool like this would scratch up the barrel beyond belief!"

Rei just nodded, smirking. "...Exactly."

Cutter's eyes went wide, before recoiling as if from a gunshot. "Gaaaaahhh!"

"It seems even the prosecution has realized the truth," the defense attorney chuckled. "I've got to hand it to you, Sergeant Hauser. It was a well-conceived plan to escape culpability for your brother's murder... you even had the good colonel here fooled. But now we know what happened!" She slammed her fists on the bench. "You used the wire brush to mutilate the inside of the rifle's barrel, so the ballistic markings would no longer match up!"

"Auuuggh!" cried Hauser as he once again dove for cover.

"OBJECTION!" yelled Cutter, now sweating a little. "E-even if what you say is true, you still can't match the bullet to the sniper rifle!"

(Uh oh, he's right,) Rei thought to herself...

"Hmhmhmm..." Vert suddenly chuckled. "I wouldn't be so sure of that, Colonel. Clearly you aren't up to date on forensics techniques."

"Lady Vert?" Lawson looked over at the CPU. "Are you saying there is a way...?"

"Contrary to what Rei is thinking, I wasn't up all night playing video games, like usual," The goddess expounded. "In fact, I was watching several crime documentaries on NepTube, in hopes I could learn something useful to help her out."

"Y-you were?!" Rei looked over at Vert, eyes wide with shock.

The busty CPU couldn't help but chuckle at the lawyer's reaction. "Indeed. And it seems my cramming paid off. You see, on an episode of Forensic Crime Files, there was one detective who suspected that a rifle recovered from the crime scene had been tampered with. So he poured some quick-drying rubber down the barrel, then extracted said rubber so he could compare a bullet to the unaltered markings at the other end. And sure enough, it was a match!"

"Wh-wh-what?!" cried Steve Hauser. "A-a test like that actually e-exists?!"

Rei slammed her fists on the bench again. "General Lawson! The defense requests that the sniper rifle be re-tested, in the manner Lady Vert has just described! It's possible the ballistic marking at the other end may still be unaltered!"

"N-no! Wait! Stop!" Hauser protested. "You can't do that!"

(Now that's definitely not a reaction an innocent man would have!) Rei thought. Aloud she spoke, "It's over, Sergeant. To borrow from Colonel Cutter's lexicon... you're surrounded on all sides. You're completely out of ammo! All your escape routes have been cut off! And any cover you might have had... has been exploded by my bunker-buster bombs of truth!" She pointed dramatically at the sniper. "The only option left to you... is to surrender!"

"S...surrender?" gasped Hauser, sweating, grasping his briefcase tightly. A shot rang out, and he barely dodged it. He held out his briefcase as if to return fire, only to have it 'shot' out of his hands. "Augh! No! Mayday!" Another 'shot' knocked off his helmet. "Mayday! Mayday! Send air support! Send anything!" A piece of his suit was 'shot' off... then another and another... "Gahh! Agghh! Stop, stoooop! I give up! I SURRENDEEEERRRRRR!"

He collapsed over the witness stand, his breathing heavy and labored, like a man gravely wounded, yet still alive. Slowly, he pushed himself back into a standing position... "...Damn it all! Damn it all to hell! That stupid deadbeat brother of mine...! He had no right to exist!"

"Stupid deadbeat?" Lawson inquired.

"He was a sully on our family name!" Steve ranted. "It's not our fault he was a failure at math, unlike the rest of us! It's not our fault he was kicked out of his apartment because he didn't know how to pay a bill! That he just started stealing anything he could get his hands on, so he could barter with drug dealers to get high!" He slammed his hands on the witness stand, growling. "It seemed like every day, there was another headline! 'Klept O. Maniac robs tourist couple!' 'Klept O. Maniac evades police again!' 'Klept O. Maniac terrorizes vacationers at airport!' Oh, my family tried to reach out to him, but he'd just laugh in their faces and swipe what he could from them, too!" He looked up, glaring at Rei Ryghts. "And don't you tell me I should've gone to the police! Those incompetent slobs just grow fat on coffee and donuts, cause they figure Lady Vert will just pick up their slack! Honestly, I was almost shocked to see a skinny detective with the CPU and Rei Ryghts...!"

"Now that he mentions it, Detective Green *did* seem to be the skinniest person at the department... Then again, he was a recent hire, wasn't he?" Vert pondered.

"So you see!" Steve shouted. "You see why I had to do it, because no one else could or would! I knew from the reports that he'd be hanging around the airport... so I set up on a rooftop outside the parking lot, and waited for my chance... sure enough, he came running by, having swiped another little trinket, no doubt! But even then, I doubted I could have hit him... but then, a miracle occurred!

(*Thud!*)

("And just where do you think *you're* going?")

("Waaaaah!")

(*POW! THWACK! THUNK! KICK!* *thud*)

"I knew wouldn't get a better chance, so I took my shot!"

(*BLAM!*)

"...for the briefest of moments, I wondered if I should try picking off the woman too, to eliminate any witnesses... but then that petty officer showed up, so I pulled back, and waited for the fuss to die down." He glanced back over at Vert. "The rest, I'm sure you know, Lady Vert..."

"Y...you disgraceful whelp!" yelled Cutter, banging his fist. "Whether you shot your brother by blood, or your brother-in-arms, it's the same to me! You should be ashamed, Gunny!"

"Not if he was scum!" Hauser retorted. "Admit it, I did my family and every person who got robbed a favor, by rubbing out that piece of dirt!"

"OBJECTION!" Vert slapped her hand on the bench. "You removed a sully on your family's name? I think not, Mr. Hauser."

"Wh-what do you mean by that?" the former soldier asked.

"Quite simple. Everybody who knew your notorious brother knew him as 'Klept O. Maniac', not Rickard T. Hauser! We didn't find out his real name until *after* he died." She shook her head in disgust. "The only one who has sullied your family name... is *you*, Steve Hauser, by murdering your own kin in cold blood!"

Hauser's eyes went wide at that. "M... me? I sullied... the name...? I...? ...no... No... NO! NO! NO! GAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" He recoiled as if shot in the head, before finally collapsing to the ground, unmoving.

"Medic! Medic! We got a man down!" cried Colonel Cutter reflexively, as the crowd chattered. The bailiffs went into action, picking up the unresponsive sniper's body and quickly carrying him out of the room...

A few minutes later, General Lawson had finally managed to calm the courtroom.

"Well!" the JAG officer muttered, "This was quite the unexpected turn. Who would have guessed Ms. Ryghts sniper theory to have been correct? It's been a while since I've had a trial this exciting...!"

(Personally, I could do with a little less excitement myself,) Rei sighed internally.

"Colonel Cutter. How is Gunnery Sergeant Hauser?" Lawson inquired.

"He's regained consciousness, but he's completely listless. Seems Lady Vert's final words broke him completely," Cutter shrugged. "He's coolin' his heels in the brig, at least until we can have him turned over to the local leos."

"What about the ballistics test?" Rei pressed.

"Got the results right here," Cutter held up a piece of paper. "It was a match, just like Lady Vert suspected. Looks like Petty Officer Johns was in the wrong place at the wrong time, just like Mr. Schneider was. As was Miss Macintosh..." He shook his head. "I gotta hand it to ya, Ryghts... never thought my first loss in court would be to a civilian, of all people..."

"It's not about winning or losing, Colonel," Rei retorted. "It's about finding the truth. And believe me, you're not the first 'undefeated prosecutor' I've had to deal with. You find a lot of them in Lowee..."

"Guess I should've taken a tour of duty in that country then," Cutter said with a tinge of sarcasm. "Still, I lost fair and square. You stuck to your guns despite the odds, and managed to come out the victor. A job well done, Rei Ryghts. I salute you!"

"Th... thank you, Colonel!" Rei said as she clumsily returned the salute.

"At least the good colonel is a graceful loser," Vert nodded.

"Very good," said Lawson. "In that case, I will announce my verdict. This court finds the accused, Petty Officer Adrian Harold Johns..."

 **NOT GUILTY**

"ADRIAAAAAAAN!" cried several soldiers from Adrian's unit.

"LAAAAAAMMME!" Adrian yelled back, a grin on his face. The gallery then dissolved into whoops and cheers as confetti rained down from the ceiling.

"Is that their rallying cry?" Rei sighed.

"Must be," shrugged Vert.

"All right, soldiers, continue your celebrating outside! Dismissed, troops!" ordered Lawson as he banged his gavel one last time, to end the trial.

To be concluded...

I tried adding a little 'Revisualization' sequence to this chapter... let me know if it works, or if I should drop it for future stories...


	7. Post Trial Wrap-Up

So, here's the first epilogue chapter, taking place right after the trial... the last chapter will take place a few days later.

Drean- Yeah, Steve will likely now plead guilty in order to keep from further tarnishing the family name...

allen uchiha3- Thanks! Perhaps I'll include it in a future story, then...

DaToskin- Actually, the TV show I was referencing is called 'Forensic Files', on the CNN Headline News channel, which is based on actual real-life case files. In fact the 'filling the tampered gun with rubber' trick is based on an actual episode I watched...

Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney

The Dead Thief's Turnabout

By Derald Snyder

Post Trial Wrap-Up

 _August 18, 11:32 AM_

 _Leanbox Army Base_

 _Training Grounds_

The defendant lobby had been too crowded with all of Adrian's fellow soldiers congratulating him, so Rei and Vert had stepped outside in order to get some air. A few minutes later, Peach came outside as well, running up to Rei and grabbing her in a bear hug.

"Thank you soooooo much!" The blonde cried out in joy. "I knew you could clear Adrian's name, I just knew it!"

"...hhhhhnnnnngggghhh!" was all Rei could get out as her face started to turn blue...

"Peashy, dear, you're suffocatiing the poor girl," Vert quickly pointed out.

"Huh? ...OH!" Peach finally took notice of Rei's lack of air, and promptly set her down, the lawyer taking in a deep breath of air. "S-sorry, Rei... guess I don't know my own strength sometimes."

"*gasp* Is OK," Rei grunted out. Once she had caught her breath, she stated, "But you know what the sad irony is? If Steve Hauser had waited just one more day, Klept O. Maniac would've been captured thanks to you and Adrian. He certainly wasn't escaping after that beating you gave him..."

"Yeah..." Peach looked down. "But if I hadn't done what I did, that guy wouldn't have been able to shoot him, either... I kinda feel like I'm partially responsible."

"Absolutely not," Vert disagreed. "Peach, you couldn't have known what Steve Hauser was planning. All he did was take advantage of the situation. You were just helping out your boyfriend, after all..."

"That's right," Rei nodded. "You did nothing wrong, as far as I'm concerned."

"You should listen to those two," said Adrian as he walked up, still in prison uniform but no longer cuffed. "You were just following your military instincts- trapping the enemy in a classic pincer movement. Don't be so hard on yourself."

"Oh, Adrian..." Peach turned to her boyfriend. "I'm so glad you'll be able to return to Army service, at least... But it's all over for me. Maybe I should have testified as myself instead of 'Sergeant DeRommer'..."

"Just be glad you avoided a dishonorable discharge," the petty officer pointed out.

"Yes, about that..." Vert spoke up. "I may not be able to reinstate you, Peach, seeing as you did break the rules... but I think I could give you something almost as good."

"W-what do you mean, Lady Vert?" Peashy turned back to the CPU.

"Well, see... I was thinking I might hire you as my personal bodyguard," Vert explained. "And I'm certain I can compensate you well enough to support both you and your mother..."

"What?! A-are you serious, Lady Vert?!" Adrian gasped in shock.

"No way! Y-you don't need protection, Lady Vert!" Peach protested. "You're more then capable of defending yourself! Y-you don't need me!"

"I never said I couldn't defend myself," the goddess countered, "However, my VIT, that is, my physical defense is rather low, and my HP is average at best. I may be fast enough to dodge attacks, certainly, but one solid hit and I'm reeling. You however, are more than capable of taking a hit with that armor of yours, so you can cover my weaknesses to an extent..."

"A fragile speedster and a mighty glacier," Rei nodded. "Sounds like a good combo to me..."

Peach bit her lip. "I still dunno..."

"Peach," Adrian turned his girlfriend to face him. "I think you've just been made an offer you can't refuse. I know many of my fellow soldiers would be chomping at the bit for a job like this..."

"...and just how many of those fellow soldiers are perverts?" Peashy retorted, looking Adrian in the eye. After a few seconds, however, she turned back to Vert. "...OK. I'll accept your offer, Lady Vert... but I have my conditions."

"Such as?" the goddess prodded.

"If I'm going to be your bodyguard, I'm going to take the job seriously. I don't wanna be your 'cuddle toy' or something, like the other you does with five-year-old me. I'm an adult, after all!"

"O-other her? Five year old...?" Adrian looked completely lost.

"Long story, Adrian. I'll explain later," Peach moaned as she rubbed her temples. "I barely understand it myself..."

"So you wish to be treated like an adult," Vert nodded. "That's fine with me, Peashy... no, Peach. I wasn't going to make you into a cuddle toy anyway. I can always dote on little Peashy when she comes to visit, after all..."

"Okay..." Peach agreed. "The only other thing is... could you maybe come with me when I go to tell Mom about this? I dunno if she'll believe me otherwise..."

"Certainly," the CPU smiled. "It's a deal. As for you, Rei..." She turned to the horned lawyer. "It doesn't seem fair for you to have done this case _pro bono_ , so I'll make sure you're compensated for your work. And I won't take no for an answer."

Rei sighed, "W-well, if you insist, Lady Vert... b-but I'll only charge m-my usual fee. Th-that's fair, r-right?"

"So be it then," Vert assented. "Anyway, Adrian, while I hate to impose on you so soon after you've been cleared, but could you get changed back into your uniform and escort Rei back to the Basilicom for me?"

"Yes, ma'am," Adrian nodded. "But what are you going to do?"

"I have to have a word with someone," the Leanbox CPU stated, as she turned and walked off...

 _August 18, 12:03 PM_

 _Leanbox Army Base_

 _Commander-in-Chief's Office_

"What do you mean you lost the case?!" the four-star general shouted into the phone. "...a sniper? But how could Lt. Ward have... wait, what? Rei Ryghts?! Are you serious, Colonel?" He paused for a moment. "What the hell was Lawson thinking, letting her-?" He was then interrupted by a knock at the door. "Who is it?!"

"Vert, the CPU."

The general's breath caught in his throat at this. "Uh... *ahem* Listen, Colonel, we'll have to continue this discussion later. Just know that I'm very upset with you!" With that, he hung up the phone. "Come in, Lady Vert..." The blonde goddess promptly entered, closing the door behind her. "So what can I do for you, ma'am?"

"I wanted to have a word with you," Vert began, "about your treatment of a certain petty officer..."

The man's eye twitched slightly. "Which petty officer?"

"Adrian-118," the busty CPU responded, "who was just acquitted of trumped-up charges of second-degree murder and use of excessive force."

"T-trumped up?" the general grunted. "What do you mean, 'trumped up'?"

"Do you think me a fool, commander-in-chief?" Vert stated sternly. "Adrian told me everything... about how you disdained his suggestions for improving the army... how you've passed him over for promotion several times... and most recently, assigning him an utterly incompetent lawyer to assure his conviction..."

"How did he know that- that I don't know what you're talking about?" the general tried to cover himself.

"So it *was* you..." Vert smiled radiantly. "Perhaps you and I need to have a talk about how you treat your subordinates..." Her voice seemed to carry a subtle, but threatening undertone, which caused the man's eyes to go wide as his upper lip trembled...

In that moment, he knew, he had mucked up.

And as anyone who knew Lady Vert was aware, you do *not* muck up in her presence...

*The End... or is it?*

Just one more chapter left... anyway, read and review!


	8. Bonus Chapter: Seeing Double

And here's the bonus chapter! This fic is now complete! Thanks to all who stuck with this one!

Draen- I had a couple ideas for a case in Lastation, but they've all gone in the trash so far... might have to wait until something else inspires me...

DaToskin- Thanks for the suggestion, but I dunno... it doesn't seem to spark my creative POWAHS. :P

Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney

The Dead Thief's Turnabout

By Derald Snyder

Bonus Chapter: Seeing Double

 _August 21, 10:33 AM_

 _Leanbox Basilicom_

(Life is strange sometimes,) Peach mused to herself as she polished her armor, once again dressed in her yellow-and black hoodie with black shorts. Just a few days ago, everything seemed to be falling apart... Adrian arrested on false charges, herself being discovered and kicked out of the army, the higher-ups seemingly poised to let the army degenerate back into utter incompetence... But now, she had a new job as Lady Vert's bodyguard, Adrian had been cleared of all charges, the true culprit had pled guilty and was now behind bars, and Vert herself had apparently browbeat the commander-in-chief into giving Adrian a medal of commendation for his efforts, as well as promoting him to Petty Officer First Class. She smiled as she remembered Adrian's unit cheering for him...

Her reminiscing was cut short, however, by a 100-decibel airhorn blast that echoed through the entire Basilicom. Peach promptly stood and headed for a source of the noise, a miffed expression on her face...

Sure enough, as she approached Vert's room, she saw the goddess herself rubbing her temples, Rei Ryghts right behind her as she put her airhorn away.

"How many times are you going to wake me up like this?!" the busty CPU protested.

"You said we were having visitors today! Excuse me for wanting to make sure you had time to freshen up!" Rei retorted. "Perhaps if you didn't spend all night playing your silly MMOs..."

"There's nothing silly about them!" Vert sighed. "MMORPGs are serious business, and require a serious effort! But, I guess that's a bit hard for casual gamers like yourself to understand..."

"With all due respect, Lady Vert..." Peach decided to cut in. "Perhaps the reason we're casual gamers is because our day jobs take up most of our time! I mean, I can't imagine the amount of paperwork Rei here has to go through, being a lawyer and all..."

"Don't I know it," the former goddess sighed. "When I was first hired, it seemed my job was nothing *but* paperwork... Still is, for the most part... and don't get me started on cleaning the toilet..." Before Peach could ask what she meant by that, a doorbell sounded.

"What?! They're here already?!" Vert cried in shock, her eyes shrunk to white circles.

"Told you so," Rei muttered, causing the CPU to groan in exasperation.

"Peach, would you be a dear and get the door while I get ready?" Vert ordered as she retreated to her bathroom.

"Of course, Lady Vert," Peach nodded, heading downstairs...

When Peach got to the door, however, she was shocked to find none other than Vert herself upon opening up. "Wha-?!" she gasped, her eyes shrunk to white circles.

"And... who might you be?" The other Vert asked, who was dressed differently than before.

"Make way for Pea!" a tiny voice cried out, followed by Peach getting tackled- hard- in the stomach, sending her to the floor reeling. "Hey, wait, you're not the other Bert!"

"Peashy!" the other Vert admonished. "What have I told you about doing that?"

"Huh...?" Peach picked her head up... and was immediately confronted with her five-year-old self, who looked at her curiously as she sat on her stomach. "Y... you..."

"Ummm..." Peashy stuck a finger in her mouth. "Do I know you? You kinda look like me..."

The other Vert's eyes went wide as recognition registered. "My word... are you... the Peashy from this dimension?!"

"Huh...? OH!" Peach gasped as her train of thought re-railed itself. "Y-yes, that's me... Peashy, get off, please." The younger girl obeyed, allowing Peach to stand straight. "M-my name is Peach C. Macintosh, ma'am... former Staff Sergeant in the Leanbox Army..." She bowed briefly. "A pleasure to meet you, alternate universe-Vert..."

"You know her, Bert?" little Peashy asked confusedly.

The Ultradimension CPU turned back to her charge. "Peashy, you know how there are two of me, two of Noire, and two of Blanc? Well, it seems there's two of you as well... this Peashy is just all grown up, that's all..."

Peashy's eyes went wide as she looked up at the other her. "Really? You're ME?"

"Th-that's right, little Peashy," Peach affirmed as she bent down and ruffled her other self's hair. "You can call me big sister, if you want..."

"I can? Really?! YAY!" cried Peashy as she tackled the other blonde to the ground again. "I have a big sister!"

"PEASHY! What did I just tell you?!" the other Vert admonished.

"I-it's OK, Lady Vert. I was ready for her this time," said Peach as she quickly sat up, with little Peashy in her lap. "I used to do that with Mom and Dad all the time, when I was little..."

"Well, it seems everyone's getting along well," Vert's voice echoed from the stairwell. The other Vert looked over and saw her counterpart, with Rei hiding behind her.

"Well, I have to admit, I wasn't expecting to come face-to-face with a grown-up Peashy," the other Vert muttered. "But what is *she* doing here?" she indicated Rei.

"I-I'm not a th-threat anymore!" The lawyer said as she stepped out from behind Vert, her arms raised in a defensive gesture. "I p-promise!"

"That's not what I was concerned about..." sighed the other Vert. Just then, another voice spoke up from outside...

"Vert, why d-did you have t-to make *me* c-carry th-the luggage?!" Hearing that voice caused Rei's eyes to widen as her pupils shrank to near pinpricks. No. No. This wasn't happening. Surely it was just someone with a very similar voice. Surely it couldn't be-

Her hopes to the contrary were dashed, as Rei herself came through the door, dragging two heavy suitcases. "Y-you're not g-going to m-make me c-carry these u-up the... stairs..." the other Rei trailed off upon locking eyes with herself, dropping her suitcases, as Peach looked back and forth between the two in surprise and shock.

"Y-you..." was all Rei could get out.

"Oh dear," sighed the other Vert. "Well, this is awkward..."

"Why did you bring her here?" Vert asked in disbelief.

"Peashy insisted," the other Vert explained. "She was like, 'If Mommy's not coming with us, I'm not going!' You know I could never say no to her... So why is your Rei here?"

"It was supposed to be a vacation for her..." Vert sighed, as she regarded the two Reis...

"Um.. h-hello there," the other Rei offered weakly. "Y-you look like y-you're doing well..." She then spied her counterpart's attorney's badge. "I-I see you're a l-lawyer n-now..."

Rei said nothing as she walked to her other self until they were only inches apart. Her expression seemed to be a mix of disbelief and disapproval...

"Um... a-are you s-still mad at m-me for wh-what happened?" the other Rei inquired.

"Am I still mad?" Rei abruptly spoke, as she closed her eyes. "Hmmm, let me think on that for a moment..."

 _*CRACK!*_

The blow was so fast that nobody saw it, though the aftermath was apparent, as the other Rei's glasses went flying off her face, the former Tari CPU falling to the ground, putting a hand up to a rapidly-reddening welt on her cheek.

"Does *that* answer your question, bi- blithering idiot?!" Rei quickly caught herself as she glanced over at little Peashy. (Mustn't swear in front of children...)

"Ow-oww! I'm sorry! I'm so, so very sorry!" The other Rei apologized profusely. "I swear, I never meant for that to happen to you! I-I was only t-trying to help y-you b-become more c-confident and a-assertive!"

"You damn near ruined my life!" Rei retorted as she stood over the other her. "Do you have *any* idea how long it took me to repair my reputation in Lowee, after I was exiled there?! And I'm still a pariah in all the other nations! I can't even leave the Basilicom here without escort, so I don't cause a panic!" Her fists were clenching at her sides, as if considering whether to hit her other self again... But just then, someone intervened, not either Vert, but-

"Stop it, Mommy!" cried five-year-old Peashy as she put herself between the two, her arms spread out. "Don't hit Mommy anymore! That's not nice!"

"Wh-" Rei blinked in surprise. "Why are you calling *me* Mommy? I hardly even know you...!"

"It don't matter! Mommy is still Mommy!" Peashy asserted. "And mommies don't fight!"

Seeing the small girl trying to defend the other Rei, putting on a brave face, though her eyes looked on the verge of tears, caused the boiling cauldron of anger within Rei to reduce to a simmer. "...Fine. I suppose I've gotten my point across." Turning on her heel, she walked back towards the stairs... "If you need me, Lady Vert, I'll be in my guest room playing Deathly Instinct." With that, she marched up the stairs, the sound of a door slamming being heard shortly thereafter.

"...Well, I suppose that could have gone worse," Vert sighed.

"Indeed," the other Vert agreed, as she handed the other Rei's glasses back to her.

"Are you OK, Mommy?" asked Peashy worryingly.

"Yes, Peashy, Mommy's fine," the other Rei reassured her 'daughter' as she put her glasses back on, still nursing her cheek. "J-just a little sore, th-that's all..."

"Hey, little Peashy?" Peach spoke up. "How about we go outside and play for a little bit, let the adults talk this over?"

"Can I, Mommy?" Peashy asked politely.

"Of course, Peashy," the other Rei nodded. "Go on and have fun, OK?"

"OK!" Peashy agreed, before slapping Peach in the leg. "Tag, you're it!" She yelled before running outside...

"Wha- Hey, no fair!" The older blonde protested as she chased her 'sister' out the door.

"So much for you being the 'older sister'," Vert couldn't help but tease her counterpart.

"Well, I can't exactly compete with Peashy herself, now can I?" the other Vert heaved a sigh. "But putting that aside... Perhaps I could try talking with your Rei? After all, I was a direct witness to everything that happened with the Seven Sages and all... maybe *I* can convince her to put aside her hatred..."

"You're more than welcome to try," Vert nodded.

"W-what about m-me?" the other Rei inquired.

"Well, perhaps you and I could play a game together on my PC," Vert suggested. "Though, I only have one controller, so you'll have to use the keyboard..."

"F-fine by me," the other Rei assented. "B-back in my d-day, keyboards were all we had t-to use a-anyway..."

 _August 21_

 _Leanbox Basilicom_

 _Chika's Old Room_

Rei was busy beating the crap out of her AI opponent when there was a knock at the door. "Who is it?!" she growled angrily.

"Vert from the Ultradimension," came the answer.

"...Are you by yourself?"

"I am. I promise."

The lawyer sighed as she paused her game, before getting up and unlocking the door, allowing the other Vert to enter, before quickly closing and re-locking it.

"So this is a fighting game?" the alternate Leanbox CPU observed. "Would you mind if I joined as player 2?"

"Other controller's in the cabinet," Rei pointed out. The other Vert nodded as she retrieved said controller and hooked up. "I hope you're not going to try and convince me to forgive my other self..."

The busty blonde sighed. "Listen, Rei... I was there when the fracas with the other Rei hit its climax, so I can understand where you're coming from, somewhat. No woman deserves what happened to you. At the very least, you should be glad you came out of that incident relatively unscathed..."

"Emphasis on 'relatively'," the former goddess retorted. "So are you going to play or not?"

The other Vert promptly sat on the bed next to Rei as she switched to Versus mode. "So, you're playing as a werewolf?"

"Better to tear people apart savagely in the *virtual* sense than literally," Rei explained.

"I see," the other Vert nodded. "I suppose I'll choose this one, then..." She selected a busty brunette wielding a staff.

"Stick with what you know, huh?" Rei muttered as she selected a stage.

A few minutes later...

"No no no! How are you doing so much damage?!" the other Vert protested as she frantically hit buttons.

"Try using some of your super meter," Rei muttered.

"'Super meter'? I don't even know what that is!" the alternate CPU protested. "Stop hitting me! My life meter's already gone!"

 **UUULTRAAAA COMBOOOOOO! SUPREME VICTORY!**

"Get good, scrub," Rei chuckled sinisterly as she pushed her glasses back up on her face.

"Ooooooooh!" the other Vert growled, a vein pulsing on her forehead. "That was completely unfair! I jumped in blind! You should have gone easy on me! I demand a rematch!"

"Your funeral," Rei shrugged as she restarted the game. (Feels good to win against Vert for once... even if she's not my world's Vert...)

 _August 21_

 _Leanbox Basilicom_

 _Vert's Room_

"S-so what are we g-going to play?" the other Rei asked nervously.

"A real-time military strategy game," Vert replied as she booted the PC up. "Peach- that's the older Peashy- and I were having some good fun with this last night."

"Y-you don't say..." the former Tari CPU muttered as she sat in the chair next to Vert, shifting the keyboard in front of her as Vert picked up her controller. "A-at least my Peashy and yours are g-getting along w-well..."

"OH MY GOD, THEY'RE HUUUUUGE!" Peach's voice echoed from outside.

"...Sounds like little Peashy just showed her 'sister' her HDD form," Vert observed.

"Y-you should have seen h-how y-your other s-self reacted," the other Rei chuckled lightly.

"I can imagine," the busty goddess rolled her eyes as she started the game...

Some time later, the two virtual armies were locked in what seemed to be a stalemate.

"You're better at this than I thought," muttered Vert as she clicked away at her controller.

"You do realize I've been at this since before any of you were born," the other Rei pointed out.

 _WARNING! P1 BASE TAKING HEAVY DAMAGE!_

"What?!" Vert cried in shock. "But how?!"

"Clearly you didn't notice the small unit I broke off to flank you!" the other Rei smirked sinisterly.

"No, no, no! Fortify the base defenses!" the CPU cried as she button-mashed.

"Too little, too late, fool!" the bluenette crowed triumphantly.

 **KA-BOOM!**

 _P1 BASE DESTROYED! P2 WINS!_

Vert's jaw dropped, as did her controller, which noisily clattered to the floor. "I... I... I lost? Me?"

"You came 1,000 years too soon," the other Rei taunted.

 _August 21_

 _Leanbox Basilicom_

 _Hallway_

The other Vert seemed to be in a daze as she walked out of the guest room. "I cannot believe this... Even after studying the game mechanics, I still can't win...!" She then saw her counterpart walking out of her bedroom, their eyes locking, their identical expressions telling them everything they needed to know...

"You lost too?!" the two Verts exclaimed simultaneously.

"You mean you couldn't even beat my younger self?" said Ultradimension Rei as she walked out from Vert's room. "What a joke!"

"Well, I guess I can be grateful to my other self for one thing," muttered Hyperdimension Rei. "Thanks for taking my Vert down a few pegs."

"Please," chuckled the other Rei. "These two are both scrubs compared to us!"

"We're *both* scrubs?!" cried the two Verts as they looked at each other. There was only one way to respond to that...

 _ **"OBJECTION!"**_

~*Fin*~


End file.
